Romance

Why You Should Never Force A Relationship That's Not Working

It's a terrible experience to finally win over the guy you've had a crush on for ages, only to witness it crumble before your very eyes. Occasionally, relationships conclude not because either of you are terrible people, but because you simply aren't suitable for each other. That's why it's wiser to release it and move on.

1. Relationships should be hard work but not a full-time job

While it's crucial for even the most harmonious partners to put effort into their relationship and offer maintenance when needed, it should not be the most challenging aspect of their day. Being with someone who shares similar values as you makes things much more manageable, and leads to a healthier and more enduring relationship.

2. Neither of you is happy

Even if you both deny it out of respect for each other, the truth is that neither of you are benefitting much from this relationship. The longer it continues, the more likely you are to become resentful that your partner isn't who you believed them to be. It's possible that the only reason this relationship has lasted this long is because both of you are hesitant to acknowledge the reality. If things aren't working out by now, they're unlikely to ever do so.

3. Your friends can see how strained the relationship is

It's challenging to fabricate chemistry between two individuals. When you both socialize with friends, it's probable that your interactions make the rest of the group uneasy. The tone and dynamic between you might be similar to that of siblings, which is sufficient to cause discomfort to others.

4. Time is somewhat limited if you both want different things

If you have a strong desire for marriage and children, but your partner is hoping you'll have a change of heart, the relationship is not a good fit. Even if everything else seems perfect, this misalignment is a deal breaker. These are two fundamental things that cannot be compromised. The longer you stay together, the more difficult these discussions become. While there are many paths to starting a family, if you have a specific dream that your partner isn't supportive of, it's best not to waste any more time.

5. The more you force, the less of a chance you'll be friends

It's possible to have a great friendship with a guy but lack any romantic chemistry. Perhaps you're simply not attracted to each other in that way, even if you wish you were. The sooner you end things, the less hostility you'll have towards him. Sometimes, even after a breakup, ex-boyfriends can still be valuable to have in your life to some extent.

6. A bad relationship might ruin your entire concept of relationships

At some point, we have all had unsatisfactory boyfriends, but if you've been struggling to make a dead relationship function for months (or years), you may have overlooked that its primary function is to be fulfilling. The purpose of dating is to find someone who complements you and your personality. If your relationship is full of drama and you anticipate a fight every day, it's an indication of incompatibility.

7. Relationships should always be partnerships

If you've been carrying the bulk of the load in a relationship for a while, you may come to the conclusion that being alone is preferable. For instance, if you ask for more help with household chores, and your partner repeatedly makes excuses instead of creating a plan, he's not acting like a partner. Instead, he's behaving like a child, and unfortunately, it's improbable that he will change. This situation is a completely valid reason to end a relationship.

8. You might forget your worth

If you and your partner argue frequently, it's possible that you have both said hurtful things in the heat of the moment. Not only is this behavior emotionally abusive, but it's also possible that your partner has made you feel like you're a bad girlfriend, which could make it difficult for you to move on.

9. You'll come off as being a little desperate

When you initially realize there are problems in your relationship, it's reasonable to try to salvage it, and your partner may attempt to end things while you insist on giving it another chance. But if this happens for the second or third time, it's evident that your partner wants to end things. Forcing him to remain in the relationship is only going to result in catastrophe in the future. You should not be with someone who does not want to be with you.

10. If you stay together, you'll always wonder whether or not you could have been happier

It's possible that you're clinging to a shattered relationship because you're afraid to take the risk of dating again. This is understandable, particularly if you were in a long-term relationship. However, you'll eventually have to overcome this fear. You only have one life, and do you want to spend it constantly wondering if it could have been better if you had a little more courage?