After discovering a guy who possesses a great sense of humor, intelligence, good looks, and kindness, and treats you like royalty, you have been on numerous dates, and the future seems promising. With a stable relationship, you begin to consider double dates, given that you and your partner have some friends in committed relationships. It sounds ideal - spending time with your loved one and friends. However, the reality may not be so perfect. In brief, many things can go wrong.
1. Everything becomes a competition
Initially, you may not realize it, but double dating has the potential to trigger anyone's competitive nature. Suddenly, you begin to second-guess things you wouldn't have thought about before. Who has the superior boyfriend or girlfriend? Are they having a better time than you? Do they ever argue? Who's more accomplished? Who's having more intimacy? These minor uncertainties gradually seep in. And before you know it, you're attempting to establish superiority rather than merely cherishing each other's company.
2. Your conversation topics get stale
Admit it, couples can occasionally converse about trivial matters. Do we really need to discuss subjects such as income, real estate, career prospects, and offspring incessantly? Certainly not! The problem arises when you spend a lot of time with other couples, and such discussions begin to occur more frequently.
3. It's easy to lose your sense of self
Maintaining your individuality can be challenging when you're in a relationship with one person, let alone when you're also spending time with another couple. This may compel you to behave in a manner that better aligns with the group's interests or even adjust your beliefs to match everyone else's viewpoints.
4. You start to overvalue what it means to be in a relationship
Spending time exclusively with other couples can magnify the significance of being in a relationship. If you and your partner were to split, would you continue to socialize with the other couple? The answer is probably not. The social expectation of being in a relationship intensifies, which can add stress to your relationship and personal life. It's important to remember that being single is a valid and healthy choice too.
5. You run the risk of becoming too similar
If you limit your social interactions to individuals who are similar to you and share your life stage, there's no room for growth. Engaging in healthy debates and having your opinions challenged by others is crucial for personal development. Listening to people with diverse viewpoints is how we learn and cultivate compromise. When you spend most of your time with your partner and another couple who think exactly like you, the opportunity for personal growth diminishes.
6. You forget about your other good friends who are single
Spending most of your time with your partner or engaging in double dates may lead to a reduction in the time you spend with your single friends. It's important to remember that these friends have been with you for a long time, and it could be hurtful to them if you frequently ditch them for group activities or exclude them because they don't have a partner.
7. Appearances become everything
Frequently socializing with another couple can lead to an emphasis on maintaining appearances. People tend to avoid conflicts or admitting relationship problems in front of others. The priority becomes saving face, even if there are underlying issues. This can result in problems being left unaddressed and ultimately escalating over time.
8. You rush the relationship
Every relationship is unique and progresses at its own pace, even if both couples started dating around the same time. Constantly hanging out with another couple can lead to a comparison of timelines, which can be problematic. Seeing another couple going on trips or getting engaged while you haven't can create a feeling of being left behind. This can result in the temptation to rush parts of your relationship to keep up, which can be damaging.
9. Your friend groups stay isolated
Spending too much time with other couples can prevent you and your partner from meeting each other's friend groups, which is crucial for a healthy relationship. It's important to observe how your partner behaves with their friends and how they treat yours, as it can reveal a lot about their character. When your friend groups remain isolated, it can negatively impact your relationship.
10. You forget to focus on each other
Just like everything else, relationships require attention. If you always go out with other couples, you might neglect the need to focus on each other. It's important to take time to appreciate your partner's positive traits and remind yourselves why you started dating. Prioritizing each other is crucial as your core relationship is with each other at the end of the day.