Published in Feb 2019 / Updated in Aug 2021
Don’t take a lot of pride in being the “strong silent type.” This personality trait helps neither you nor the people around you; it only suppresses issues you will eventually have to deal with at some point in the future.
But while people can admire your endless positivity, the truth is that we are human and we cannot always be okay.
Actually, you should not always be okay. Sometimes you can express what you feel, even if it is negative, for your own good.
You will often hear it said that no one is perfect, and yet, society expects us to be perfect all the time. But it is very true that we are not perfect, and there are times when we will wallow in depression and negative emotions that we might even project onto others.
However, the social convention is to bottle these feelings up to avoid being judged or destroying the controlled and perfect persona we have worked so hard to build.
For some time now, I have been honest about not being okay, and it has changed my life. After having to deal with toxic people who can literally suck the life out of you and also battle issues like depression and anxiety disorders, I think I deserve not to be okay when the moment calls for it.
I strongly believe it should be like this for all of us. Sure, society puts a lot of pressure on us to keep negative feelings to ourselves, but that is not fair when such behavior destroys us from the inside.
Many people will think you’re weak when you show them that you are not doing fine.
But they miss one important detail – being honest about your emotional or mental status can be cathartic.
And I can promise you one thing – as soon as you make the resolve, to be honest about you not being okay, you will realize that you are not alone. You will see the internal turmoils many people are going through that are secretly tearing their lives apart.
Holding in such feelings can even destroy those around you because they have to manifest themselves in one way or another. For instance, you might grow less empathetic and become less supportive of others when they need you the most.
So, there is absolutely no reason to feel guilty that you are not feeling fine and someone else can see it.
I have also observed that some people go through a lot of trouble to seem perfect. But if you look closely enough, you will realize that they have more problems than most of the people who are not afraid to show the world that they are not okay.
Sure, there is a lot of positive inspiration on social media, saying that you should always be positive. This can put a lot of pressure on you to “remain” positive even when you are not. But you have to work on not holding on to negative sentiments that will eventually affect your mental and physical wellbeing.
So, don’t be afraid to be who you are. Nobody is always okay, and it’s okay if the world sees that.
Expressing what you truly feel is not a sign of weakness but the ultimate symbol of strength in a world that is forcing people to appear to be something they are not. In other words, it’s perfectly fine to speak out when you are not okay.