When You Should (And Should Not) Make The First Move

It's advisable to assess the situation carefully, regardless of who initiates the first move in a relationship, to avoid the risk of rejection. Nobody wants to face rejection, so it's crucial to determine the appropriate time to express your interest or when to slow down. Here's what you need to know about when to take the initiative and when to hold back.

1. You shouldn't if you're not sure about their feelings

If you're uncertain whether your crush reciprocates your feelings, or if you believe they may make a move in the future if you don't, it's essential to pause and reflect. If you're unsure how to respond to these inquiries, it's best to stop and consider your options.

2. You shouldn't if you're not the type

Making the first move is not always stressful for some women, and they tend to forget about it if things don't work out. However, for other women, it can be overwhelming to put themselves out there, and they might not prefer the idea of making the first move. It's crucial to acknowledge that it may not be suitable for everyone, and it's better to stay true to yourself than doing something you feel obligated to do.

3. You shouldn't if you're acting out of fear

Are you considering making the first move because you genuinely want to express your feelings or take a chance at something incredible? Or, are you doing it because of panic and anxiety, fearing that the person might end up with someone else if you don't act fast? If it's the latter, it's not the right reason to do it, and it may end up having adverse effects.

4. You shouldn't if you have friends in common

If you're uncertain, or less than 95% certain that the person reciprocates your feelings, and you share many mutual friends, it's advisable not to make a move. Creating an uncomfortable atmosphere in your social circle by avoiding the person if they reject you and disappear is not ideal.

5. You shouldn't if you're not sure of your feelings

It may seem obvious, but many people make the first move even when they're not truly interested in their crush. As a result, they might fumble through asking the person out and give the impression that they're not genuinely invested. Avoid making a move just for the sake of it!

6. You should if you're doing it for yourself

While you may desire to be with someone, it's crucial not to make it all about them. If necessary, make the first move to gain closure and move on instead of wasting any more time on them. Taking the initiative can be empowering because it's about you.

7. You should if you're cool and casual

If you can express yourself without getting too anxious or creating awkwardness, then why wait? We often take making the first move too seriously, which isn't helpful. Remember, you're just asking for their number or a date, not proposing marriage!

8. You should if you trust your instincts

Perhaps making the first move hasn't crossed your mind before, but now you have a strong urge to do it. If your intuition is encouraging you to take charge of your fate and ask that person out, it's essential to follow that impulse and give it a try.

9. You should if you dare to learn from it

Making the first move, regardless of the outcome, can be a powerful way to express yourself, take control of your life, and put yourself out there. Seeing it in this light can give you the confidence to go for it. Whatever happens, you'll come out feeling more self-assured.

10. You should if you know you'll regret not doing it

That feeling of "what if?" can be overwhelming at times, especially when you know you might regret not taking a chance. Perhaps you feel it when you realize your crush won't be in your class anymore or when you're chatting with someone you may not see again. If you know deep down that you'll regret not taking action, then seize the moment and make your move.