Believe it or not, there is a huge difference between being in love with someone and loving someone. But for most people, the differences are not usually apparent. Love can be full of passion, just as being in love can.

But, think back on the times when a budding romance came to an end. Then all you could think of was how on earth you ever thought the person was ‘The One.’ You started to wonder – why did the love feel so real, and how could it end so suddenly?

So, to clear the air, here are 8 differences between loving someone and being in love.

1. You Choose To Love, But You Can’t Decide To Be In Love

You can decide to love someone, even though you can see a lot of reasons why you should not. That is because you can choose to see the best in them, support them, and appreciate them. Just as easily, you can decide you will not love someone any longer.

Being in love is a whole different experience. You do it without your consent since the emotions take over. You don’t get to make a conscious choice to be in love.

2. You Want The Best For Those You Love, But You Put Someone First When In Love With Them

When in love with someone, their happiness comes before your own. You can eat their favorite meals and engage in their favorite activities even if you don’t like them. But when you love each other, that’s not usually the case. There is, therefore, no pressure to do things you don’t like for your partner unless it’s really necessary.

3. When You Love Someone You Want Them Around, But When You’re In Love, You Want Them Where They’re Happy

You want those you love around you because you desire them. But when you are in love with someone, you want them to be where they will be happy. In other words, you want them to pursue their dreams and interests and be happy.

4. You Love Someone For What They Make You Feel, Being In Love Is About How You Make Them Feel

Ask most people, and they will say, ‘I love him because of how they make me feel.’ While that is accurate, it does not mean you are in love with the person. When you are in love, your greatest concern is how you make them feel because you want them to feel loved and appreciated.

5. Loving Is Hard, But Being In Love Is Easy

If you are always wondering why it’s so hard to love someone, know that it should. When you love, you have to make an effort to love even when there are a lot of reasons not to. However, when you are in love with someone, it does not feel like work. The feelings of love come naturally.

6. Loving Is A Rush, But Being In Love Is Not

When you love someone, it’s like you are high. Eventually, the lows also come. But when in love, the emotions you have towards the other person are a little more stable. In general, you are happy about the relationship. When you love someone, it’s different because you can experience lows that can make you want to do away with the relationship.

7. Loving Is About Ownership, But Being In Love Is About Partnership

Once you love someone, you want them to be yours and nobody else’s. That is why you would want them to be your boyfriend or fiance. But when you are in love, you want to be theirs as much as you want them to be yours. In short, when in love, you want a partnership.

8. Loving Doesn’t Last, But Being In Love Does

Someone you love can do something you dislike and the love can suddenly turn into hate or indifference. You might argue over something, or realize something hideous about them, and the love can end right there. That means loving is fleeting. But when in love, you don’t get to decide when the romance will end. Even when someone does something you hate or something that hurts you, you still feel drawn to them and want the best for them.