What To Include On Your "Perfect Man" List (And What To Leave Off)

Certain women approach the task of finding an ideal partner with a similar level of meticulousness as planning a wedding. They craft an extensive checklist that specifies the desired physical appearance and behavior of their dream man. However, it's not surprising that many of these women remain single since the idea of a perfect partner is unrealistic. It's recommended to abandon the unrealistic checklist with celebrity images and instead focus on a realistic and manageable one to identify the right kind of partner.

what you should include:

1. Sparkling personality

Each of us has our own preferences when it comes to personality types. It's essential to identify the personality traits that make us happy in a partner. For example, some prefer a partner who is expressive with their emotions, while others prefer someone with a good sense of humor. It's likely that these preferred traits align with our own personality.

2. How much time he has on his hands

While some individuals may not mind the prospect of a long-distance relationship, others do. It's important to determine the amount of time a potential partner can dedicate to the relationship. If one is likely to become upset due to job-related constraints on their partner's time, it's best to avoid dating individuals with busy schedules. Deciding whether one wants a partner who is always nearby or can work late or travel often is crucial.

3. Interests you share

While it's true that opposites may attract, it's essential to have some common ground to build a strong relationship. Spending time together becomes unenjoyable if neither party shares any interests. It's advisable to list some interests that a perfect partner must share. These interests can be as simple as a particular music genre, which can make for excellent conversation, or as significant as going hiking every weekend.

4. Type of job

Although the type of job a potential partner has may not matter to everyone, it does to some. While having certain criteria is acceptable, it's important to keep them realistic. A few simple criteria, such as a partner who has a job, do something that makes them happy, and doesn't engage in illegal activities, are sufficient. However, it's not reasonable to have highly specific criteria, such as only wanting to date a brain surgeon who earns $200,000 per year. Instead, it may be more practical to look for someone who has a similar understanding of one's own line of work, such as dating someone in sales or retail, or to have a minimum earnings threshold that is achievable.

5. Fashion sense

Although guys may not be known for their fashion sense, it's essential to find a partner who dresses in a way that appeals to one's own preferences. What is attractive to one person may not be attractive to another, so it's essential to limit the search for a perfect partner to those who dress in a way that impresses and turns on oneself. Whether one prefers Armani suits or ripped jeans and a tight tee, finding someone who dresses in a way that is desirable is crucial.

6. Sex appeal

When it comes to physical attraction, it's crucial not to become fixated on minor details. One must think generally and avoid obsessing over insignificant things. Some people miss out on great partners because of superficial factors such as hair color. It's advisable to list general physical features that one finds attractive, such as eye color, physique, or how the person carries themselves. However, it's essential to remember that these are only general guidelines, and it's okay to be flexible and mix things up a bit.

7. The must likes

Most of us have a couple of things that a potential partner must like, or else the relationship won't work out. It could be a love for pets or children, a shared interest in rock music or golf, or something else entirely. It's essential to keep this section of the list concise and limited to only a few things. Identifying these deal-breakers is crucial to avoid wasting time and energy on a relationship that is unlikely to succeed.

8. Turn offs

No list of a perfect partner would be complete without identifying turn-offs. These are the things that a potential partner must never do, such as smoking, hunting, sleeping around, or treating others poorly. If a person exhibits any of these traits, it's a clear indication that they are not the right match. Identifying one's turn-offs helps to avoid wasting time on a relationship that is unlikely to succeed due to incompatible values and behaviors.

what you shouldn't include:

1. Detailed looks

I recommend not being too specific about physical appearance because it can limit your options and make it harder to find the right person for you. Focus on more important qualities, such as personality traits and shared interests.

2. Strict salary requirements

Is it reasonable to expect a potential partner to make a substantial salary? It's essential to consider that relying solely on someone else's income may not be the best long-term solution. Instead, perhaps consider pursuing a career and earning a salary to meet your needs. It's crucial to remember that even a perfect man with a high salary could lose his job, leaving you in a difficult situation. So, it's vital to be realistic and avoid placing too much emphasis on financial status when looking for a partner.

3. Communication schedule

I have witnessed a woman create a complex chart dictating how frequently the ideal man should call, text, Skype, and visit her. This behavior can be unsettling, so it's best to avoid it. Remember that your partner has a life outside of the relationship, so give them space and be patient. Allow things to develop naturally without trying to control every aspect of the relationship.

4. Over-commitment

While it might seem romantic, expecting a man to abandon his friends and family to spend all his time with you is selfish. A healthy relationship involves spending quality time together, but it's important to also maintain individual relationships and interests. Seeking a man who will devote all his time to you is not only unrealistic but can also be a red flag for potentially problematic behavior.

5. Sharing every interest

While it's important to have shared interests with your partner, it's also okay if he doesn't share every single one of them. In fact, being in a relationship means you can introduce each other to new things and explore new interests together.

6. Being a perfect little puppy dog

It's frustrating to hear women talk about "training" their guy. It's an unrealistic expectation to expect a guy to cater to your every need and obey your every word. A relationship should be built on equality and mutual respect, not a power dynamic where one person is the boss and the other is the subordinate.

Although it's impossible to find the "perfect man," you can find someone who is perfect for you. By keeping your list more general, you'll have an easier time finding the man of your dreams.