Men often enjoy receiving oral sex from women, but not all of them are willing to reciprocate. What should you do if your new partner is reluctant to perform oral sex on you? The first step is to remain calm and not overreact. There may be a valid reason for his hesitation, or he may simply be selfish and think only of his own pleasure. If he refuses to engage in oral sex or avoids it, it's time to have a conversation with him.
1. Ask Him Why
Instead of immediately getting angry and ending the relationship, ask your partner why he is hesitant to perform oral sex on you. It could be as simple as a bad experience with a previous partner, or he may have a natural aversion to it. Understanding the root cause of the issue can help you both deal with it more effectively.
2. No More Downtown Action
Withholding intimacy should not be your first choice of action, but if your partner refuses to explain his reluctance to perform oral sex or demands it from you while ignoring your needs, it may be necessary in rare cases.
3. Introduce Toys To The Mix
While oral sex can be pleasurable, if your partner genuinely dislikes performing it, don't pressure him to do it. The goal is for both of you to enjoy intimacy, so if he is uncomfortable with oral sex, consider using toys to achieve the desired stimulation. Show him how to use them so he can pleasure you in other ways that he is comfortable with.
4. Ask If It's Just You
Don't immediately blame your partner if he is hesitant to perform oral sex. It's possible that you might be the problem. Ask him if his reluctance is specific to you. While it may be difficult to hear, it's important to keep your genital area clean and fresh to prevent any unpleasant odors or hygiene issues that may be a turn off to your partner.
5. Tell Him Why It's Important
Some men may not understand the importance of performing oral sex, particularly if they have never been asked to do it before. Take the time to explain to your partner how much it means to you and why it's an essential part of the sexual experience. You can also compare it to the pleasure he experiences from receiving oral sex.
6. Help Him Work Through His Issues
If your partner has had a negative experience with oral sex before, use this as an opportunity to gradually help them overcome their issues. Don't rush into it, take it one step at a time. Although it may require some patience, your partner may eventually enjoy giving you oral pleasure again.
7. Accept It And Move On
Everyone has sexual preferences that they may not enjoy. If your partner is not comfortable performing oral sex, accept it and move on. If this is the only issue in your relationship, consider finding a way to work around it rather than letting it ruin your relationship.
8. Help Him Master Other Intimacy Options
Oral sex is not the only way to be intimate with your partner. Communicate what you enjoy and help your partner learn how to please you in other ways, such as with their hands or toys. By doing so, you can still experience pleasure while your partner becomes more enthusiastic about satisfying you.
9. Suggest Sixty-Nine
It's not uncommon for men to experience stage fright when they're put on the spot during intimate moments. Normally, both partners are active participants during sex. However, when a man performs oral sex on a woman, he may feel like he's doing all the work while his partner just enjoys the experience. This could be a source of anxiety for him. To help your partner feel less self-conscious, try engaging in a little 69 action. This way, he'll be distracted by the pleasure he's receiving, while you'll be similarly distracted by the pleasure you're receiving from him.
10. Remember His Feelings, Too
It is important to consider your partner's feelings before criticizing them or withholding affection. If you were in their position, how would you want to be treated? Unless your partner is being unreasonable, try to find a compromise that works for both of you.
11. Try Mutual Intimacy
Sexual intimacy is not solely about physical touch. Teasing and watching each other can also be very satisfying. Take some time to sit across from each other and enjoy the experience. This can be an exciting way to learn more about each other's desires.
12. Find A New Guy
If oral sex is a dealbreaker for you or your partner is unresponsive to your needs, it may be necessary to end the relationship. This is a valid decision, especially if you are not emotionally attached. It is better to move on than remain in an unhappy situation.
If your partner is not comfortable performing oral sex, do not panic. This can happen, but it is not the end of the world. There are other ways to satisfy your sexual desires and build intimacy with your partner.