Published in Jun 2018 / Updated in Apr 2021
A lot of people try to change their personalities to fit into a particular group of people. This mostly happens to youths and young adults who will do anything to please their friends, parents, relatives, or people that they want to be in a relationship with. This always ends up with the person not knowing what he/she is doing to his/her personality. Maybe the people around you don’t like how you behave, talk or handle issues and therefore they want you to change into something they prefer. But what if what they see is already your best self?
Sincerely speaking, the first paragraph is all about myself. I have been the type of person who would do anything to fit into a group that I feel I wanted to be a part of. All that I did was things to impress my friends so that I would be accepted as part of them. I would do anything to impress the person I wanted to be in love with me, but most of the time, things didn’t work out.
Recently I attended a seminar, and the speaker was talking about “Being Yourself.” During the session, someone asked, “what about if my friends do not like it when I am myself?” What the speaker said changed my life. I quote, “let go of those who do not like the best you, the right ones will come.” This single statement opened a new page in my life. Since that day, I chose not to please anyone anymore. If I become my best self, I will get friends who like me being myself.
Allan Watts once said that ‘if you wake up being yourself, it means you have to let go of what you always imagined to be.’ In life, letting go can be a hard task to do, but if you do not fit into a certain group of people, then you will definitely fit somewhere else or with someone else. All you have to do is let yourself grow, and you will end up where you fit in. What defines you is not what your friends or your loved ones want you to be. It is what you really are, your best self.
According to Shannon L. Alder, ‘the worst regret you can face in life is pretending to be what other people want you to be, instead of being your own self.’ How you are like you, is your best self.