I have been without a partner for four years now and during this time, I have often found myself as the third wheel. Initially, I used to feel anxious about being the only single friend in a group, but over time, I have come to appreciate it for several reasons. Firstly, I have two companions who can assist me in identifying potential romantic interests, two people to ensure I make it home safely in case I have a bit too much to drink, and two friends to spend time with. Moreover, my coupled friends have taught me a great deal about love, without them even realizing it. I have been quietly observing and have gleaned some valuable insights, which I will share now.
1. Little kisses and glances go a long way
Relationships are sustained by the small gestures of affection that are shared between partners, such as the secret smiles or stolen kisses that light up their faces. These seemingly insignificant moments of intimacy are what generates the spark that keeps the relationship alive. Not only can these moments be seen by those around them, but they can also be felt, as they create a palpable energy that radiates from the couple.
2. Appreciation is key
The mutual admiration between two people is unmistakable, evident in their interactions whenever they are in each other's presence. It's not just the words they use, but the gestures and displays of consideration that demonstrate their deep appreciation for each other's company. These small but meaningful acts of affection reflect the genuine respect they have for one another.
3. Apologies are necessary
Occasionally, one person may say or do something that offends the other, but ultimately an apology is extended, even if it takes some time for the stubbornness to subside. In a loving relationship, both individuals prioritize their bond over their individual egos. It's not about always being right, but rather about recognizing that love conquers all.
4. Fights happen, but that doesn't mean it's time to walk away
Despite the occasional intense arguments and emotional outbursts, a relationship is not necessarily over. It simply requires extra effort and patience to rebuild and get back to a good place. While some couples may experience breakups and reconciliations, the sign of a truly strong relationship is when a couple can weather a major conflict and work through it without giving up.
5. Differences are good
Having everything in common is not a requirement for a successful relationship. While shared values and morals are important, it's beneficial to have some differences as well. These differences allow each person to broaden their horizons and discover new interests they may not have explored otherwise. While similarities are great, a relationship can still thrive even if you don't have everything in common.
6. Imperfection is perfect
Despite the idealized portrayals of perfect relationships on social media, I find myself envious of the real deal when I witness it in person. The reality of a relationship extends beyond the happy moments shared on social media. It includes the mundane conversations, the private jokes, and even the comfortable silence between two people enjoying each other's company. It encompasses the disagreements, the playful teasing, the highs, and the lows, and the ability to navigate them all while still holding onto love.
7. Love is compromise
For a relationship to thrive, it's important to understand that it's not a one-way street. Both individuals need to be willing to make compromises and healthy choices that benefit both of them. It requires a shift from thinking like an individual to thinking as a team. It's important to let go of selfishness, and be willing to bend on your personal preferences while also creating new ways of doing things together.
8. It's worth the wait
Despite the challenges and the personal freedoms that may need to be given up, waiting for a love that never gives up is always worth it. This love may not be perfect, but it thrives on a single glance and is more than what meets the eye. Anything worth having requires effort, and nothing that comes easy is truly valuable. Therefore, I am grateful for being the third wheel and witnessing the true meaning of love.