The concept of romance is not my cup of tea. To say I despise it may be too strong, but the thought of a man surrounding a bath filled with rose-scented candles while love songs play in the background makes me feel uncomfortable. I do not want to seem unappreciative, but the whole thing seems repulsive to me.
1. It's All Just So Cliche
Romance is not a one-size-fits-all kind of thing, despite what Hollywood may have sold us. Women are all unique individuals, and the idea that buying us flowers or chocolates or taking us out to a candlelit dinner will win us over is just tedious. I personally find traditional romance unimaginative and unappealing, so if a guy tries to woo me with such methods, I am likely to flee.
2. It's Often Used To Win Points
What is the motive behind these romantic gestures? Are these guys using them as a symbol of love, or are they trying to score points with me? I have heard countless guys boasting about how romantic they are in the past, as if it is a competition to win a medal or get laid. Regurgitating corny acts from terrible rom-coms is not going to impress me or win me over, ever.
3. It Makes Me Feel Obligated
The pressure to express gratitude or physical affection in response to grand romantic gestures can be overwhelming. It can make me feel like I owe something to the person, which is not romantic at all.
4. Grand Gestures Feel Fake
The conventional symbols of romance like teddy bears, chocolates, and rose petals seem forced and insincere to me. These gestures often lack personalization and thoughtfulness. Unless someone truly loves stuffed animals or has a passion for gardening, these gestures can feel meaningless.
5. Poems Are Self-Indulgent
Love poems don't appeal to me. I find them cliché, self-indulgent, and cringe-worthy. Some things are best kept private, and romantic musings are no exception.
6. Romantic Getaways Are My Version Of Hell
I enjoy going on weekend getaways with my partner, exploring new places together. However, when the trip is labeled as a "romantic break," it becomes unbearable for me. The pressure to dress up, find the perfect restaurant, and the cliché rose petals on the bed feel suffocating. It's not my idea of a romantic getaway.
7. A Guy Staring Deep Into My Eyes Makes Me Feel Violated
I admire men who can maintain good eye contact during a conversation, but I despise those who stare at me for an extended period, making me feel violated. Avoid attempting to gaze into my soul through my eyes; even if you do, what you see inside might terrify you.
8. Public Displays Of Affection Are Just Wrong
Those ubiquitous viral marriage proposals in which hundreds of strangers dance to a Bruno Mars melody with an unsuspecting partner make me want to vomit. People who feel the urge to demonstrate their love to the world are deeply cringeworthy. If two individuals are genuinely in love, shouldn't it be a fantastic feeling shared only between them?
9. Knowing How Much Effort A Guy Has Put In To Be Romantic Is Anything But
When a guy puts in a lot of effort to create a romantic evening or day for me, it makes me feel uncomfortable. I don't know how to react or behave in these situations, which is why I detest the idea of romance. Demonstrating love or affection for someone should be effortless, but many men become nervous and feel compelled to adhere to the movie stereotype of romance, which is not sexy. I don't want to feel awkward around a guy who is also feeling awkward. Furthermore, I don't want to feel angry around a guy who is overly confident. The conventional chivalry checklist only makes most people uncomfortable. It's time for it to go away.
10. The Little Things Matter
Although I may not be the type to swoon over traditional acts of romance, I assure you that I am not a cold-hearted robot. To me, it's the little everyday acts of kindness that hold the most significance. I find more value in genuine gestures of affection, rather than grand displays of insincere affection. For example, if I'm feeling down, it's more meaningful to me when my partner brings me pizza and beer to cheer me up than a dozen roses. I cherish the moments when we're being silly and having fun together more than when we're sitting across from each other at a fancy dinner table. These small, thoughtful acts of love often go unnoticed by men, but they mean the world to me. I guess you could say I'm that kind of girl who would choose a cactus over a bouquet of red roses any day.