This Is How Narcissists Play The Victim And Twist The Story
Published in Apr 2019 / Updated in Aug 2021
Narcissists are well-known for their destructive social behaviors. It is truly a misfortune having to deal with these people. The only predictable thing about them is that they will act like completely horrible human beings whenever they can serve their own self-interest.
Here, we are going to have a look at some behaviors narcissists have and how they change the story and play the victim.
1. Denial and delusion
Narcissists have their own versions of the truth, and reality constantly contradicts it. To make their lives seem real when it is not, they usually have delusions about who they are and how things actually are. There are times they genuinely believe that their delusions are the truth. At other times, they simply deny reality until they start to believe it themselves.
Narcissists have a strong desire to be right, and they need others to agree with them at all costs. In pursuit of this social validation, these people have to lie chronically. Their self-esteem cannot take any form of disagreement. In every story, they have to lie to make themselves seem like heroes or victims so that they get this attention. Other people often end up looking cruel, immoral, evil, and selfish.
If there is one thing narcissists love, it is projecting onto others. When a narcissist accuses you of jealousy, he is the jealous one. If they talk about someone being mean to them, then know that they were mean to that person. In other words, whatever unhealthy behavior they have towards others is made the victim’s fault. They do this in order to always be the good guy in the story.
4. Framing the story
A narcissist starts telling the story from the point where the other person had a negative reaction, completely cutting out the part where they did something horrible to bring about such a reaction. So, when a narcissist tries to bully you but you stand up for yourself, they will often try to make it look like they were out to do something good for you but you took it badly. They will completely forget the part where they ill-treated you. Their intention is to make you look overly sensitive or bad in one way or another.
5. Triangulation, slander and character assassination
Triangulation is whereby a narcissist manipulates communication between two parties. This is closely related to slandering, smearing, and even gossiping. The narcissist will spread false bad information about someone, which is character assassination.
A closer look
When you look more closely at a narcissist’s story, you will see that it is complete crap. A narcissistic parent who complains about how their child hurts them will often turn out to be the disrespectful one. The child only stood up for themselves, and the parent reacted by spreading false negative information about them. All narcissists act in a similar manner by trying to ensure that when you stand up for yourself against them, other people take their side. They achieve this by spreading bad information about you.
Narcissists are incapable of realizing that they are terrible people. They go further and even try to make good people look bad at their expense. They will also go to a lot of trouble to get sympathy and support from others, even when they are clearly in the wrong.
Many people cannot see behind this veil, and they often fall victim to their nasty behaviors. Deep down, narcissists are insecure, and they feel bad about themselves. But instead of dealing with that problem, they focus on making themselves feel better by bringing other people down and manipulating them into giving them false validation.
The next time you spot a narcissist, run and don’t look back. These people are beyond help, and being with them will only drown your energy and waste your time.