“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.” ―Bruce Lee
When we have expectations for ourselves, it is a huge advantage. They can help us make progress and hit goals in careers or relationships. However, if you flip that around and put the same high expectations on the people around you, you set yourself up for disappointment. It goes without saying we all deserve basic things in our relationships, like respect, but assuming anything other than that may leave you less than happy.
If you can examine and be honest with yourself and adjust what you assume others will do, it can help you have a more realistic view of things. They are some things that are good to know that if you stop expecting them, you prevent yourself from any further disappointment.
1. Stop expecting them to do the “right thing” based on your standards.
People’s upbringings, culture, and spiritual beliefs all affect people’s morals and ethics. Don’t worry about what others are doing, focus on your morals and values and do what’s right for you. For everyone else, live and let live.
2. Stop expecting approval from people.
This is your life, and you deserve to be happy and to live a life that you are excited about. You are not here to live up to someone else’s expectations, and their opinions shouldn’t make you forget that. In turn, you shouldn’t expect others to live up to your expectations. The thing is, the more you approve, are happy and confident in your own decisions, the less you seek approval from everyone else about your choices.
Follow your path and stay true to your purpose and vision. Dare to be yourself and follow your guidance and intuition no matter what the opinion of others. Don’t compare yourself to others or let the opinion of others who don’t share your vision influence you.
3. Stop expecting more respect off people than you give yourself.
If you don’t respect yourself why would anyone else have a reason to respect you? If you struggle internally with self-esteem, you can’t expect others to give you the confidence. Practicing self-love and identifying and meeting your own needs, that means saying “no” to others if needs be. Respect for yourself shows in the way you carry yourself and the way you treat yourself and others. People reciprocate what they notice. Make the decision this minute, starting from now; you will never again beg anyone for love, respect, and attention that you should be showing yourself.
4. Stop expecting everyone to like you.
It’s not possible for every human being to be liked by everyone else. We each have our personalities and qualities that don’t always work with certain others; it’s nothing personal, they don’t gel together. You may feel unworthy to one person, but to another you are priceless. Spend time with the people who value you and don’t ever forget your worth. The hardest battle you’ll ever fight is the battle just to be yourself. Not everyone will like you, no matter what you do. The things that make you different or weird are the things that make you who you are, and the right people will stay in your life because of those things.
5. Stop expecting others to be mind readers.
Not everyone is a mind reader, sure there are some whose intuition is more finely tuned than others, but most can’t read feelings or facial expressions so well. Just because you might be able to read people and are more sensitive to their feelings, does not mean everyone else is on your wavelength. You need to express yourself clearly, rather than expecting others to do the guesswork on what you might be thinking. Open communication builds stronger relationships in the long run.