Breakup

The Struggles Of Having An Ex That Won't Go Away

In an ideal situation, our former partners would vanish from our lives once a relationship has ended, making it easier for us to move on. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. The ex may still be present in our lives due to proximity, shared social networks, or their unwillingness to accept the end of the relationship and attempt to rekindle it. In extreme cases, you may still be living together post-breakup. Here are ten difficulties one may face when dealing with an ex who will not disappear:

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1. You Had To Break Up With Him Multiple Times

You believed that the initial breakup would be final and both of you could move on, however, the ex continued to contact you, pleading for another opportunity, forcing you to reiterate your decision multiple times. Instead of a single break-up, you have had to go through the process multiple times, which can be emotionally draining.

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2. You Still Have The Same Fights Every Time You See Each Other

Ideally, after breaking up, conflicts would come to an end, but unfortunately, this may not always be the case. When encountering each other, old arguments may arise, preventing you from fully embracing your single status and making it feel as if the relationship is still ongoing, all because the ex is unable to accept that the relationship has ended.

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3. Other People Think His Persistence Is Romantic

In popular media, after a separation, the couple often reunites after the male partner performs an extravagant romantic action. In reality, it is important to be able to move on from a relationship without feeling guilty. Your friends and acquaintances may find the ex's persistence romantic, but they need to understand how uncomfortable and intrusive it can be to have someone not accept the end of a relationship.

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4. People Think You're Lucky To Have Someone Who Cares So Much About You

This can be particularly challenging, as it can give the impression that you are not being truthful about your ex's excessive behavior. Some friends or acquaintances may not believe you, or may think that you are encouraging him with false promises. This can be especially difficult if they are friends with him as well. It is important to surround yourself with individuals who will support and validate your feelings and experiences during this time.

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5. You Don't Feel Like You're Really Allowed To Move On

If your ex is consistently present in your life, it can make it difficult to process your emotions and feelings following the breakup. You may also feel restricted in your ability to engage in romantic or social interactions with others, even if you are ready to move on. This can be a confusing and frustrating situation, as the relationship has ended yet you are unable to move forward in a typical manner.

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6. You Feel Like You're Losing Your Friends

Occasionally, friends may not acknowledge the change in your relationship status and invite you and your ex to the same events. This can lead to difficult decisions, such as attending and potentially experiencing awkwardness or declining and missing out on social gatherings with your close friends. In this situation, it is important to communicate with your friends about your needs and preferences. Let them know that you need some time and make plans to spend time with them separately. If they do not understand and support your needs, it may be worth reevaluating the strength of these friendships.

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7. People Assume You're Secretly Still Dating Or That The Breakup Isn't Permanent

When your ex is frequently present in your life, it can create the appearance that you are still in a relationship. This can be extremely uncomfortable and frustrating, and can even impede your ability to form new connections. To avoid this, consider finding new places to socialize and spend time, particularly if you both have similar interests and tend to frequent the same locations.

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8. Sometimes You Actually Second Guess Your Decision To Leave Him

When your ex repeatedly expresses the belief that you were meant to be together, it can cause you to question the validity of the break-up and your decision. This is particularly true if you are not currently being pursued romantically by others. It is important to remember that the reasons for the breakup are valid and there is no need to settle for less than what you deserve. Trust in your own judgment and do not second-guess your decision.

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9. Your Phone Gets Blown Up To The Point You Might Actually Change Your Number

While it may seem like a hassle, many people choose to change their phone number after a breakup because an ex is unable to accept the end of the relationship and continues to contact them. Receiving constant messages from someone you no longer wish to communicate with can become draining and overwhelming.

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10. You Know It Sounds Immature, But You're Thinking Of Blocking Him On Your Social Media Accounts

It may seem extreme, but if your ex is behaving inappropriately, it may be necessary to take this step. You have the right to use social media and not be harassed or bothered by someone constantly. If you feel the need to block your ex, do not hesitate to do so.