Breadcrumbing refers to the act of leading someone on without any real intention of following through with promises or long-term goals. You might be the person they crave one day, but then they disappear for days or even weeks. It's a classic cat-and-mouse game, but in this scenario, the cat always gets what they want in the end. It's important not to follow the breadcrumbs, as it will only end poorly for you.
1. You Have All Sorts Of Wonderful Dates Imagined, Plotted, And Planned… And He Won't Commit To One Of Them
Why should a guy bother setting up future plans with you when he can just string you along and pick you up at the most inconvenient time possible? And of course, you'll make yourself available for him. We've all been there and done that. To avoid this, be just as nonchalant about seeing him again as he seems to be. There's no harm in playing a game of chicken with a breadcrumber.
2. You Call Him Out For Leading You On And Things Are Fab… For Two Days
It's a classic game of cat-and-mouse. When he senses that you're losing interest in him or that you're wise to his game, he'll reel you back in by showing you the type of man he thinks you want to see. Don't worry, though, because it won't last long. After a day or two at most, he'll go back to his old ways.
3. He Pops In And Out Of Your Life As If He's Got Some Kind Of Claim On You
It's not really a valuable claim, more like a claim ticket for a bag that you lost six months ago at a regional airport. The bag wasn't even that important, to begin with, and wasn't of good quality. It's up to you whether you want to keep it or not, but retrieving the bag requires more effort than simply texting someone to say "hey" at random times.
4. Speaking Of Texts, He Sends You Drunk Texts; A Lot Of Them
A guy who mainly texts you during bar hours on weekends is probably up to no good. It's not endearing that he's thinking of you while he's out with his buddies; it's actually quite strange and shows a lack of respect for you and your time.
5. He Rears His Ugly Head Anytime It Seems Like You're Just Over It
Breadcrumbing behavior is all about playing games, all the time, and across all channels. The best way to frustrate a breadcrumber is to lose interest quickly and permanently.
6. He's Said In The Past That He's Just Not That Into You But Intermittently "Checks In" To See How You're Doing
If you and he weren't friends initially, then his behavior is not acceptable. It seems that he intends to keep you as an option for a future romantic encounter and is only reaching out to confirm that you're still open to the idea.
7. He's Lazy, Lazy, Lazy
Although he may be one of the few breadcrumbers who keeps his promise and spends time with you when he says he will, it's still not worth pursuing him. When you do hang out, he puts in minimal effort while you eagerly try to please him. Don't be that girl who wastes her time on someone who doesn't value her worth.
8. The Height Of Flirting For A Breadcrumber Is Sliding Into Your DMs
Truly, a breadcrumber's tactic is to attract you through social media and then abruptly stop responding to your messages, mentions, or DMs. If you fall for this trap, you're only setting yourself up for potential letdown or, worse yet, encouraging the breadcrumber's behavior. Such situations can become quite complicated and unpleasant.
9. He Doesn't Like To Talk About Their Feelings Or The Future Of The Relationship
Do you remember Matthew McConaughey's character in "Dazed and Confused" and his preference for dating high school girls? Some people are like him, preferring to stay in surface-level relationships to avoid any significant conversations. Why bother relating to someone on your level when you can continue living your life in superficial connections?
10. There's Absolutely Zero Satisfaction Surrounding Your "Relationship" With This Person
Sure, getting the occasional "like" or "thoughtful" text message might seem exciting at first, but it won't pay off in the end. It will only leave you feeling empty and disappointed. Remember, you can't survive on breadcrumbs alone, so don't settle for someone who doesn't appreciate you.