Being a single dad with part-time custody is just as hard as being a single mom. But single dads don’t get a rallying cry of support as single moms do.
While we all know too well that raising a child in a two-parent household is tough, raising a child solo is a whole new ballgame. It’s even more demanding and downright exhausting.
So, having support from others can go a long way.
Posting on subreddit r/UnpopularOpinion, one single dad compared what his everyday life is like to his ex-wife’s, and his finding is heartbreaking.
The dad found that, more often than not, single moms are given the benefit of the doubt compared to single dads.
Of course, his finding has sparked fierce debate online.
Being a Single Dad
The Redditor explained that his ex-wife got full support from even strangers after they separated, even though it’s her affair that caused the divorce.
“My ex has women telling her on social media how amazing she is for raising kids on her own. And how strong and independent she is for picking herself up after the divorce (that she caused with her affair) and being a mom. I have none of that.”
The dad further explained that he doesn’t seek any reward for being a single father. Instead, he wants others to recognize that this is a real issue for divorced couples.
“It is not that my friends don’t think I’m a good dad. It’s just that as a society, we have made the single mom a sort of unsung hero.”
“What about single dads? We do the same sh*t.”
“I work and take care of my kids the same way, but I don’t get celebrated like I’m doing something amazing. I just get the recognition that almost all dads get nothing.”
The single dad continued to say that it’s the same when he tries to attend mom groups to socialize his kids.
He revealed that the single moms alienate him, and he’s left to play with his kid and avoids using his phone.
What’s more, they treat him as though he’s not even a parent.
“I’ve been to mom groups to socialize my kids, and I’m this weird anomaly. They don’t even talk to me.”
“So then, I play with my kid, and I’m not just there on my phone.”
“It’s not the same for us. We don’t have the same resources.”
Why is This a Problem?
After the single dad shared his thoughts, his post went viral, receiving mixed reactions from other Redditors.
Many people who disagreed with the dad said that this is what feminism is all about.
As a single parent, you want people to support you the same way they do with your ex.
But single dads are consistently seen as if they are the ones that led to the divorce, which sometimes isn’t the case.
So, there should be equality for both single dads and moms. They should be given the same support and be treated the same way.
Part-Time Vs. Full-Time Custody
This Redditor also recognized that he’s fortunate to have part-time custody of his child. But he pointed out that those who do full custody should get more support for their hard work.
“I know I’m not a full-time single parent. I’m still a single parent for a week at a time, and sometimes it’s badass and super rewarding cause my kids are the shit.”
“Sometimes, it’s hard. Just like it is for parents in a couple, part-time custody or full-time custody.”
“I can’t imagine doing it completely on my own 24/7, and those people get major props.”
This single dad’s posts inspired others going through similar situations to share their own heartbreaking experiences.