Too many times in our lives, we are quick to self-diagnose and jump to the conclusion that we are depressed, when in reality, it all has to do with who we let into our lives. Assholes exist to make us miserable, but only when we let them.
1. They can’t hold a proper conversation
Assholes don’t know the first thing about listening. They are loud and obnoxious in every exchange because they are in love with hearing themselves speak. They will shout, talk over you, interrupt you when you try to chime in, and over-dramatize everything. They think they are the only ones with something worth saying. Show me a shy and quiet asshole, and I’ll bet all I have that the “asshole” tag used on that person is exaggerated.
2. They are selfish bullies who love tormenting others
Assholes have zero regards for the opinions and values of others and care only for their own. They have no problem with and actually thrive on making fun of other peoples’ opinions and emotions, just to make themselves feel better about their own. Outside of themselves, assholes couldn’t care less about anyone else.
3. They are arrogant know-it-alls
Assholes will pretend to know everything there is to know about everything. Watching and listening to an asshole go on and on about something they clearly have no understanding about has to be one of the most tormenting experiences in life, and they do so with so much confidence that you will be left feeling embarrassed on their behalf.
How they make us feel depressed?
If you’re not an asshole yourself, then you belong to the other class of people; the nice folk. As a nice person, you know what it means to respect other people’s opinions and don’t try to impose your views on others. You know that communication is as much about listening as it is about speaking, and all your interactions with others are punctuated with genuine empathy. You are the exact opposite of an asshole.
Because assholes cannot stand anyone who is different, you will find yourself the target of all their vile and obnoxious talk. They will try to put you down for being a nice person. They will make you feel that your being nice is a sign of weakness and that you are just gullible and naïve.
If you hear all this long enough and start taking it to heart, it won’t be long before your self-esteem becomes shattered. You may start questioning yourself, your values, and your choices. In the thick of things, you may find yourself experiencing spells of sadness and hopelessness and feeling insomnia, all of which mimic the classic signs of depression.
Except for the fact that you are not actually depressed, just surrounded by assholes who are sending you on a downward spiral.
How do you go about healing?
If you allow yourself to stick around assholes, then it’s a sure ride for you, all the way to the bottom. The best thing you can do for yourself is to sever the ties and allow yourself to heal.
The first step towards doing that is to identify all the assholes in your life. Start right from your innermost circle, that is, your friends and family. Be honest with yourself, stop making excuses for those around you, and start seeing them for who they really are.
The next step is to, of course, cut them off, or at least reduce how much time you spend around these assholes. Make a conscious effort to stay clear of their toxic influence.
Lastly, and most importantly, take care of yourself, and do you. Reverse any effects the assholes may have managed to have in your life by doing what makes you happy. Life is too good to let an asshole come around and ruin it for you.