A situationship refers to a circumstance that falls in between a platonic friendship and a romantic relationship. It can be perplexing and uneasy as both individuals are unsure about the future of their connection or each other's emotions. Here are some indications that you may be in a situationship, along with ways to terminate it.
1. You're Not Exclusive
While certain couples find contentment in being open and honest about their relationship boundaries, a situationship is quite different. It entails a lack of clarity around whether the relationship is open or not, and neither party feels comfortable initiating a conversation on the matter. This impasse can be resolved by breaking the cycle of silence and being the one to broach the topic.
2. You Tell Your Friends That You're "Not Dating "
If you find yourself spending a lot of time with someone and instinctively dismissing the idea of being in a relationship with them when your friends inquire, then you are most likely in a situationship. This is often a defense mechanism to avoid acknowledging your desire for a formal relationship. By pretending to be too laid-back for a conventional relationship, you try to avoid any sympathy or ridicule from your friends.
3. You Don't Leave Things At Each Other's Houses
When you spend the night at his place, you might bring your toothbrush along, but you make sure to take it with you when you leave in the morning, if you stay over at all. Although it's not a conscious decision, leaving your toothbrush behind would feel odd. This indicates that you are not fully assimilated into each other's lives on a subconscious level.
4. You Don't Know How He Feels About You
A significant indicator of being in a situationship is the lack of clarity. While you may be aware of your partner's physical attraction towards you and their repeated presence in your life, it's hard to tell if they're developing deeper feelings or are indifferent towards you. To overcome the stagnation of a situationship, it's best to take a direct approach without hesitation. Although there is a chance of parting ways, it's crucial to have clarity and honesty in the relationship.
5. You Never Go Places As A Couple
Whenever you have an event like a wedding or a birthday to attend, he's not the one you choose to bring as your plus-one. Instead, you opt to go with your friends or attend solo. And in case you end up at the same event, and someone asks if you two are "together," you both deny it, perhaps after an awkward pause.
6. The Future Never Comes Up In Conversation
Situationships are characterized by a sense of ambiguity and uncertainty. There is a lack of communication about the direction of the relationship and what each person wants. Even though you may have your own thoughts about it, you don't express them openly. Whether you want to take the relationship to the next level or let it gradually fade out, there is a mutual silence. Even long-term plans such as trips or events remain hypothetical, and there's no certainty until just a few days before.
7. Sex Is The Main Event
Rarely do you conclude an evening together without engaging in sexual activity, and when that does happen, it feels like there's something lacking. Due to the physical aspect being the most consistent and dependable part of your situation, you may perceive sex as the most significant aspect of your time together. This serves as a sign that everything else about the relationship is ambiguous at best and potentially emotionally draining.
8. The Idea Of Bringing Up Your Relationship Status With Him Makes You Uncomfortable
If you find yourself feeling anxious or hesitant to define the nature of your relationship, it's a clear sign that you're in a situationship. This may indicate that you're worried your partner may not be interested in a formal commitment, or that you might not be ready for one. Although being in an ambiguous sexual relationship can be frustrating, you're not yet prepared to face the reality of an alternative.
9. It's All About Convenience
Neither of you makes a considerable effort to meet up, and if one of you is feeling tired or occupied, there's no effort to spend time together. There's no long-term planning involved as unforeseen circumstances may crop up. Essentially, spending time together isn't a priority. The sole advantage of the relationship is how easily it can be accommodated into your busy schedules whenever there's a window of opportunity.
10. You Don't Want The Pressure Of A Relationship But You're Still Unsatisfied
While some people may find happiness in a casual sex buddy or friends with benefits setup, it's not everyone's cup of tea. If you happen to fall into this category and yet remain unhappy with the relationship, then you might be in a situationship. The very nature of a situationship is unsatisfying due to its ambiguity, and neither of you knows where you stand. To overcome this, the only way forward is to have an open conversation about it. Let your partner know what you're looking for, even if it's just a reliable source of no-strings-attached hookups.