Have you ever experienced the warm feeling in your heart when a friend shows up early to your birthday party? Or when a parent notices that you're struggling and asks if you're okay? Even a small gesture, like a text from an old co-worker letting you know they're thinking of you, can make you feel loved and acknowledged. These simple acts of kindness are examples of people showing up for you. Continuously making a deliberate effort to be present in someone's life is the most fundamental way to express love and care.
1. More Often Than Not, Just Being There Is Enough
If your close friend recently went through a painful breakup, you don't need to have the right words to make her feel better. The truth is, there's nothing you can say to fix her pain. What she really needs is for you to be present for her. A simple phone call, text, or visit can mean the world to her, even if you don't have any words of wisdom to offer. As Woody Allen once said, "80% of success in life is showing up."
2. Presence Is The Greatest Gift You Can Offer
If you're spending time with a friend, would they appreciate it more if you give them your undivided attention and refrain from texting, or if you put your phone away in your bag? While tangible gifts or kind words can be appreciated, there's nothing better than giving someone your complete and genuine attention.
3. Putting Down The Phone For A While Is Half The Battle Today
I don't mean to repeat myself, but many of us have a tendency to be so attached to our phones that we fail to show up in person. While it's understandable to use your phone, considering it's almost like an extension of yourself, it's crucial to recognize when it's time to disconnect and engage with the real world.
4. A Text, Call, Or Visit Could Mean Everything
Were you aware that nearly 20% of Americans deal with a mental health problem every year? This implies that it's quite possible that one or more of your friends are currently facing such challenges. Simply reaching out to them with a friendly greeting can significantly impact their day. Even those who don't experience mental health difficulties will feel immensely grateful just knowing that they're being thought of.
5. Showing Up Is About More Than What You Say Or Do
Picture yourself attending a friend's party but spending the entire time hiding in a corner. Technically, you're physically present, but are you really there? While Woody's 80% rule holds some truth, it's important to consider the remaining 20%. Your tone, body language, and intentions all play a critical role in being truly present for others.
6. Consider The Energy You Bring
It cannot be emphasized enough that showing up, either in person or over the phone, is crucial. However, it's equally important to be mindful of your own state of mind. If you're feeling completely miserable, that energy is likely to be reflected in your interactions. Taking a moment to be mindful can help you improve your energy and bring a more positive vibe.
7. Giving Someone Space To Be Where They're At Can Help Them Heal
Showing acceptance, understanding, kindness, and compassion can make a significant difference in your interactions with others. If your friend is having a tough day following an argument with another friend, simply being there for them and listening to their emotions can help them process and work through their feelings. It's important to remember that showing up is not just about being physically present, but also about providing emotional support.
8. Tame A Wandering Mind
We've all been guilty of being a bad listener at some point, where our minds are preoccupied, and we fail to comprehend what someone is saying. The look of disappointment on the speaker's face can make us feel remorseful. To prevent such situations, it's important to be mindful of our thoughts and focus our attention on the person speaking in front of us. By doing so, we can become better listeners and show respect to the person sharing their thoughts and feelings.
9. Be Willing To Be Brave
Being fully present with another person can be daunting and intimidating. It takes courage to put away distractions, look into your partner's eyes, and genuinely listen to what they have to say. However, it's essential to be willing to take this step to truly experience love. Despite the fear, try to push through it and embrace vulnerability to strengthen your connections with loved ones.
10. Let Yourself Be Imperfect
Despite our best efforts, we may not be able to implement all of these suggestions perfectly. However, that's perfectly alright and doesn't make us any less of a good friend, lover, or family member. What matters most is that we continue to make an effort and try our best to be intentionally present in our interactions with others. The ability to consistently show up and share love is what sets apart individuals who have strong and enduring relationships.
11. Show Up For The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly
A vital aspect of any relationship is being there for someone even during the tough times. It's not enough to only show up when things are going well. Sometimes, your partner needs a shoulder to cry on, your parent requires a warm embrace during a difficult moment, and your friend needs someone to lend an ear as they vent their frustrations. Providing comfort and support during these moments is crucial in building and maintaining strong relationships.
12. When You Really Show Up, Your Friend Or Lover Can Feel It
When you take the effort to be fully present with someone, it creates a deep emotional connection that reaches their heart. You're able to connect with them on a profound level where you're all in tune with each other's emotions. It's truly a beautiful experience, and it's easy to tell when someone is genuinely showing up and when they're not.
13. All People Deserve To Be Loved Wholeheartedly
Why does it matter to show up and be present in someone's life? Is it really that important? The answer is yes. It's essential for the people in your life, and for yourself. Love, connection, and presence are the core components of a fulfilling life. By holding back and only loving with half your heart, you're missing out on the opportunity to experience the beauty and richness of human relationships. So, take the time to show up for yourself and for those around you. You won't regret it.