Being a mom is just about the hardest job in the entire world. You spend each and every waking hour worrying if you are doing the right things to raise them. But there’s actually good news for the nagging that you did.
A study conducted by the University of Essex found that nagging your daughter is actually a very good thing. Not because of what it does to them on the spot, but how it shapes them as they grow into adults.
So those times you gave dirty looks across the house. The arguments, decisions, and talks that ended in screaming. And the harassment you sometimes endured by your child was well worth it. It’s often easy to get caught up in the moment, but raising kids is all about the bigger picture and setting a foundation for growth.
The study looked at teenage girls for six years, generally starting at 13/14 years old. The group consisted of around 15,000 young females. The results conclude that females who said mom “nagged” them about chores, school work, and daily responsibilities were more likely to end up with high paying jobs.
The study also showed they were less likely to become teen moms. The nagging isn’t always what you assumed it to be. It doesn’t always mean you are yelling and being the bad parent, sometimes it’s just a simple reminder. One of the key things found in the study is that kids are listening, even when you think they are not.
Ericka G. Rascon-Ramirez who was one of the lead researchers said, “”In many cases we succeeded in doing what we believed was more convenient for us, even when this was against our parents’ will. But no matter how hard we tried to avoid our parents’ recommendations, it is likely that they ended up influencing, in a more subtle manner, choices that we had considered extremely personal.”
This goes to show all the nagging, leads to training your child in their subconscious. Your child’s pushing back is normal. They actually learn quite a lot when doing so, even though it seems like they are ignoring.
Researchers in the study found that even if the child wasn’t the best student, a “pushy” mom led to success later in life. It showed them that if they try their hardest good things can happen. This “pushy” behavior also led to lower teen pregnancies in both the United States and Britain.
This is a huge win for all your new moms and experienced moms out there. While it can often feel like you’re your teen daughters worst enemy, it’s actually a good thing. They will grow up to be more successful than those with “laid-back” parents.
It’s important to note, you don’t want to be a negative nagger. Instead, use encouragement and always avoid “I told you so”.
So raise a glass, sit back and know what you’re doing is the right thing. Don’t worry about the present, but know in the end your child’s life will be better due to your parenting.