Please Leave Her Alone If You Aren't Crazy About Her: Don't Waste Her Time

Please Leave Her Alone If You Aren’t Crazy About Her: Don’t Waste Her Time

One of the most frustrating dynamics as a single person has got to be the reality that some people are time wasters.

They can be online shoppers, people in queues at the post office, people ordering in front of you at the drive-thru who haven't even checked the menu, or even your close friends.

But the killer form of time wasters is those in relationships. You know the type when their online dating profile says 'looking for something casual' or 'happy to see where things go', even – and bear with me here – 'open to new things'.

None of these epithets mean anything at all, bar the fact that some people are just out there to have a good time and don't really care what emotions get mushed on the way.

But my biggest pet peeve of all of these are the people in a relationship that clearly hasn't got the legs to take it particularly far, but no one acknowledges it.

No one mans up and takes the plunge to break things off

How is that productive? You're wasting time, money, emotions, and your lives on each other! Yet, neither of you can see a future with the other, but it's somehow too much effort to get the whole deal over with.

Strange times, these – strange times indeed. I mean, we all know that the person we sacrifice is ourselves, so an act of self-care or self-preservation is always something low on our priority list.

Even if we're spiting ourselves in the long run, the short-term benefit of not hurting other people's feelings – however valiant – is doomed to incur the opposite response.

If you aren't crazy about the other person, or if you can't see a viable future with them, what are you doing?

Maybe they are head over heels, or, if not yet, they may in the future get feels.

What then?

Why not be honest with each other and communicate the end of the relationship. Well, I guess poor communication was probably one of the reasons why you aren't destined to go all the way into marriage territory.

Go figure. But either way, think about it. It's one thing to be unsure of your emotions, and to see how things play out. Even try a couple of dates or different occasions to see what your heart is thinking.

But there's only so much thinking or rationalising a person can do. If neither your heart nor your eyes have told you what you need to know, or you haven't felt the spark necessary in a relationship, just call it quits.

You won't get in trouble, and it's not a waste of time up until that point. Some people aren't compatible, that's a fact of life. It's nobody's fault!

You just have to look each other in the eyes and break the news

Don't continue to follow each other on social media. That only makes it harder for a clean break.

Don't continue to like their pictures on Instagram, you're only complicating things. Blurring the waters. Sending mixed signals. Leave her alone if you don't care about her.

If you aren't crazy about a person and it's clear that you won't grow to be, just let them live their life. You can move on with yours without dragging another person into it unnecessarily.

You can still give your hearts time to form a connection, but there's no use going through the motions just for the sake of it. The truth is, you don't owe faking affection to anyone, just honesty.

I think we could all do with putting on the big girl pants and making the big decisions today. Your load will feel lighter and more positive, I promise.