People Who Stay Friends With Their Exes Might Be Psychopaths A New Study Reveals
Published in Oct 2018 / Updated in Aug 2021
Sometimes parting ways with someone you were madly in love with can be the worst thing ever. You can’t imagine living without them. So instead of saying goodbye forever, you opt to remain friends. This might sound really tempting or even okay at the beginning, but is it possible? Can you just stay as friends without getting hurt eventually?
Is staying friends with an ex a form of desperate attempt to still remain in their lives even with the knowledge that they don’t feel the same about you anymore? Is it a form of denial that whatever you had going on is over?
Is staying friends with an ex normal?
A recent study carried out by Oakland University researchers suggests that if your ex-partner wants to remain friends with you after ending things with them, they might have serious personality issues. They could be a psychopath. This might come as a shocker to most people, but it is true. Here’s why.
The study that was published in Personality and Individual Differences analyzed the personality traits portrayed by 861 people and their past relationships. Participants were asked to answer questions pertaining to their current relationships and to also state whether they stayed friends with their exes or not.
This was then followed by the scientists having them fill a questionnaire to determine psychopathic and narcissistic tendencies. The results were shocking.
According to those results, those people who were found to still be friends with their exes showed personality traits similar to the ones psychopaths portray.
Who exactly is a psychopath?
A psychopath is someone who portrays some sort of moral insanity. A psychopath shows traits like lack of empathy, poor behavioral controls, lack of realistic goals, impulsivity, failure to accept reality, and selfishness. Refusing to accept that a relationship is over and wanting to cling to someone who is no longer interested in you check all of the aforementioned boxes.
Why psychopaths refuse to accept the truth and insist on sticking around:
Remaining close to an ex is a strategy employed by psychopaths to continue enjoying the benefits of that failed relationship. This is also according to the study. Some of these benefits include money, sex, and information. Psychopaths will try to use tricks and false charm to manipulate their way back into a failed relationship.
The idea of their ex moving on with someone else doesn’t sit well with them. They will want to stick around and monitor every single thing that you do and try as hard as possible to prevent you from moving on. They will keep reminding you of what you had in the past, with the hope that you will change your mind about not wanting to be with them anymore.
In the end, the ex-partner cannot move on, and if they do, their ex will do whatever it takes to ruin their new relationship. Psychopaths are selfish and put their needs before everyone else’s. They will try to tie down their ex-partners to the past because it is convenient for them. The needs of the people they claim to love do not matter at all to a psychopath.
If you still have a clingy ex, then you should definitely be cautious around them, because they are exhibiting clear traits of psychopathic behavior.