Unless you're planning to join a nunnery soon, the word "celibacy" likely doesn't bring much joy to mind. However, consider this: a year of self-imposed celibacy could provide the restart you need in multiple ways. That's why I believe that every woman should give it a try.
1. You're taking control of your life
In a world that prioritizes love, sex, and relationships, intentionally choosing to remain single is a powerful statement. Saying "no" to the pursuit and committing to it for a year can be empowering. Cultivating self-control in any aspect of life can foster personal growth, and focusing on oneself during this time is even more beneficial.
2. It's a gift you're giving yourself
Although it may not appear obvious initially, committing to a year of celibacy can actually be a year devoted entirely to self-improvement. Consider it as you would the first year of a romantic relationship—an opportunity to invest, learn, and prioritize yourself. It's a year of beneficial self-centeredness.
3. It's so easy to get caught up in relationships
Personally, I find it effortless to become involved with a guy, even if it was not my intention. I've entered into several relationships without giving much thought to what I truly wanted. This tendency is what leads to serial monogamy! The solution may be to swing the pendulum in the opposite direction. By telling oneself that relationships are not an option, even an average-looking guy showing interest might not seem as tempting.
4. Many women experience losing their identities in men
This is a personal issue that I can relate to, and I have yet to encounter a woman who hasn't experienced it: the gradual erosion of one's personality in favor of the relationship. Do you find yourself becoming a carbon copy of whichever man you're dating at the time? A year of celibacy could be the perfect way to break that pattern and reclaim your connection to your unique identity.
5. It's important to realign sometime
While dating, relationships, sex, and flirting are enjoyable, there's no harm in desiring them. However, they should not be the primary focus of your life. If you constantly find yourself consumed with thoughts of impressing whoever catches your fancy that day, it may be time to take a break. Remove the pressure, let go of expectations, and step away for a while to realign with what truly matters to you.
6. It's a great way to find yourself
It may seem like a cliche, but there's truth to it. How much time and energy do you dedicate to sex and relationships over a year? If you're in a relationship, it's likely a significant amount. Even if you're single and searching, you may spend countless hours on dating apps, meeting up with friends with benefits, going on dates with people you're not interested in, and scanning every gathering for potential partners. Now, consider spending all that time on yourself instead. Pursue a hobby you never had time for, read all the books on your must-read list, discover your ultimate goals and work towards them. Determine what you want to do, then take action.
7. You can cleanse your life of past relationship hang-ups
We've all experienced rebounds, and ideally, we've all realized that they aren't a sustainable solution. Recovering from a broken heart and the emotional scars of past relationships requires time. If you're using a new fling as a distraction during this period, you're not only delaying the healing process, but you're also likely bringing all of your old baggage into the new relationship. A year of celibacy provides the necessary breathing room to process old wounds and rediscover your inner strength.
8. Rediscover sexuality on your own
Abstaining from sex doesn't have to mean the end of your sexuality! There's so much to explore with your own body, and I'm confident that taking a break from partner sex will lead to a newfound appreciation for the art of masturbation. Use this time to discover your body without a partner's presence, and engage with yourself with the same tenderness, attention, and affection that you would with a partner. You'll be surprised by how much your sex life can transform.
9. You'll be a better partner for it
Following a year of self-love, self-reflection, and self-pleasure, it's impossible not to come out as a better version of yourself. The confidence you gain from a self-directed life will positively impact any future relationships. You'll have developed a greater appreciation for your independence and become intimately familiar with your body. Anyone who meets you after this transformative year will be fortunate to encounter this new, improved version of you.
