Avoiding texting an ex after a breakup is crucial. However, despite being aware of the prudent course of action, most of us struggle to resist the urge to reach out. To aid in your efforts, here are some pointers to keep in mind:
1. The Relationship Was A Bad Relationship
As you reminisce about the happy moments, the negative aspects of the relationship may not appear as severe. However, once you engage in physical intimacy with your ex-partner, those negative memories will resurface abruptly. This is a common phenomenon, and you shouldn't allow your post-breakup thoughts to influence you. It's crucial to maintain self-control and avoid the inevitable regret of "why did I get back together with this person?" So, put your phone away and exercise discipline to prevent yourself from making a hasty decision.
2. He Doesn't Deserve That Moment Of Smug Satisfaction
Upon reading your message on his phone, he will immediately assume that you desire him. Do you truly want to convey that message? Keep in mind that this individual is the same person who [insert the most terrible thing they did to you]. Refrain from granting this person a sense of accomplishment.
3. That Day When You Realize You're Totally Over Him Is AMAZING — Let It Happen
Following a breakup, it's natural to perceive your ex as the only viable option for a future partner. However, in due time, you won't even comprehend why you were involved with them in the first place. It's incredibly liberating to reach a state of complete recovery. Therefore, abandon the urge to contact them and allow time to run its course. The sooner you do so, the sooner you can obtain the life and love you genuinely desire.
4. Seeking Closure Is Just A Form Of Torture
When an individual claims that they require closure, they may actually mean that they are uncertain whether the relationship has truly ended. They believe that they must communicate with their ex-partner to confirm that it is indeed over before they can progress. Essentially, they require two breakups to come to terms with reality. Why subject oneself to that? Deep down, you know it's over. Endure the discomfort until you reach the point of complete recovery, as mentioned in point #3. You're nearly there.
5. Texting Him Immediately Diminishes Your Hotness
If you maintain no communication with him, he remains oblivious to your thoughts and actions. He may assume that you have moved on and don't think of him anymore, which makes you more alluring in his eyes. However, by initiating contact, you shatter that illusion instantaneously. Suddenly, you transform from the girl who appears to be thriving to the girl he was not particularly fond of.
6. Reaching Out To Him Says He's The Best You Can Do
It's likely that your ex cheated on you, failed to appreciate you, or made you feel unwanted, which are all terrible experiences. However, if you contact them, it implies that you don't believe you deserve better. Countless amazing men are available, and you should be utilizing your time to discover them. The sooner you begin exploring, the faster you'll find yourself ignoring texts from your ex because you'll be infatuated with someone new.
7. You'll Feel Like Crap If He Ignores You
Suppose you surrender to the urge and message your ex. What if they opt to ignore your text and never reply? You'll find yourself gazing at your phone, waiting for a message that will never arrive, and feeling foolish for even trying. That could send you down a depressing road of self-loathing for failing to resist the temptation to contact him, which is entirely unnecessary.
8. You've Already Said Enough To Him Anyway.
It's highly probable that you've already said everything that needed to be said to your ex during your relationship and breakup. What more words do you have left to convey? Essentially, messaging him at this point would be done purely for the sake of it, rendering it useless and diminishing its significance. It's best to set aside your phone.
9. There Are Plenty Of Other Things To Do With Your Loneliness
It's never a good idea to text your ex simply because you're experiencing loneliness or nostalgia. Chances are, he won't respond the way you want, and you'll find yourself regressing significantly by reminiscing with a guy who mistreated you. If you're feeling alone and yearning for affection, there are undoubtedly many family members and friends you can turn to who can fulfill that desire while also providing a healthier outlet for your emotions.
10. You're Better Than This
Ultimately, it boils down to this: you're far superior to stooping so low as to text your ex. You're a resilient, bright, and self-sufficient woman who doesn't require a man who didn't value your worth, simply because you're feeling a bit down about being unattached. Disregard that impulse and utilize your time more effectively (which encompasses essentially anything but texting him).
What To Do Instead Of Sending A Text To Your Ex
If you're in need of inspiration for ways to occupy the time that you would have otherwise spent fretting over crafting a text message to your ex-boyfriend, here are a few recommendations to consider.
1. Call Your Best Friend, Your Mom, Or Anyone At All
When you feel like giving in to the urge of texting your ex, seeking the advice of someone who can bring you back to your senses is a wise move. Whether it's your mom or your best friend, talking to them can help you see the reasons why you shouldn't contact your former partner. In fact, they might even warn you against it and threaten to reprimand you if you dare to send a message to that jerk.
2. Take A Meditation Break
Give meditation a chance before dismissing it. Although it can be challenging to quiet your mind and concentrate on nothing for an extended period, with some dedication, you can become skilled at it. Once you do, you'll experience several benefits, such as improved focus, reduced stress, and a more profound sense of tranquility. You may even find that you lose the desire to message your ex altogether!
3. Actually Use That Gym Membership You're Paying For
Although you may be paying for a gym membership every month, it doesn't necessarily motivate you to hit the gym and start exercising. However, engaging in physical activities not only helps improve your physical health but also your mental and emotional well-being. Challenge yourself to work out and push your limits, and you may find that after sweating it out and feeling the burn, you no longer feel the urge to text your ex.
4. Get Outside
Taking a break from technology and getting outside can be incredibly beneficial for both our physical and mental health. If you find yourself glued to screens all day, take a break and get some fresh air. Even a short walk around the block can help clear your mind and give you a new perspective. So, put on some comfortable clothes and shoes and head out for a bit of sunshine and Vitamin D. You might be surprised at how much better you feel afterward.
5. Take Some Time Away From Your Phone
Once again, we are all guilty of spending an excessive amount of time on our phones. So, why not challenge yourself to put your phone down for a few hours or even an entire day? I assure you that you won't be missing out on much, and you won't perish without knowing what's happening on social media for 24 hours. Furthermore, it's impossible to text your ex if you don't have your phone with you, isn't it?
6. Read A Book
If you can't recall the last time you read a book for fun, it's high time to start again. Choose a book that piques your interest and carve out some dedicated time and space to delve into the story. It may be a bit challenging to concentrate initially, but once you become absorbed in the written narrative, you won't want to return to reality!
7. Write Your Ex A Letter You'll Never Send
If you feel like you need to express yourself to your ex, but don't want to regress, there is another way. Write a letter that says everything you want to say to him, but don't actually send it to him. This way, you'll feel like you've let it all out without the negative consequences of actually reaching out to him.
8. Plan A Girls' Night
What better way to move on from a guy than to have a wild night out with your best friends? Gather everyone together and come up with fun activities to do, whether it's going to bars, dancing, or bowling. Choose something that promotes bonding and provides an enjoyable way to spend a Saturday night. When you have positive distractions in your life, you will be less likely to dwell on the past.