My Friend Keeps Going Back To Her Toxic Ex And It's Driving Me Insane

My friend is one of those who undervalue themselves when it comes to the kind of partner they deserve. Despite being amazing in many ways, she continues to return to her unsuccessful ex-partner, and I can't comprehend why.

1. She Deserves So Much Better Than Him

My affection for my friend motivates me to believe that she deserves a man who loves and treats her properly. Unfortunately, this guy doesn't fit the bill. They have established a routine where he occasionally does something nice, and she forgives him for the countless unpleasant things he does to her. Despite deserving better, her infatuation with him has blinded her.


2. He Brings Out The Worst In Her

My friend is essentially a decent human being, yet her behavior around him doesn't reflect that. She lowers herself to his level, even though he's not worthy of her. He's someone who's mandated to do a job by the court, yet he's still involved in dealing on the side. While she may tolerate his shortcomings (which, in my opinion, is an understatement), the most concerning part is that he's dragging her down with him.


3. He Treats Her Like Crap

My concern for my friend goes beyond just her emotional well-being; I'm also anxious about her safety and health. This guy has a disturbing record of hurting others and being involved in abusive relationships. I'm not just a friend who's worried about her being deceived; I'm concerned that she might experience significant emotional and physical trauma that could have lifelong consequences. Despite his actions, she continues to defend him.


4. She Thinks She's Going To "change" Him

I can't fathom why she's so fixated on her attraction to bad boys. It would be beneficial if she could mature and start dating someone who treats her well. Although he hasn't made any improvements or demonstrated a desire to change, she continues to cling to the hope that he will transform. What's most troubling is that she wants him to change for her, without recognizing that true change comes from within and for oneself.


5. He's Left Her Way Too Many Times

It's astonishing how my friend fails to recognize that he's left her multiple times before, each time claiming that he no longer loves her. It's a pattern - one moment they're cohabiting, and the next he's packing his bags and walking out. I can't understand how she can't see that if he's done it once, twice, or more, he's likely to continue doing so in the future.


6. At The End Of The Day, She Just Looks Desperate

It seems that regardless of his actions, my friend will continue to forgive and reconcile with him. What she must realize is that if she can't assert herself, he will continue to mistreat her. She's an extraordinary woman with a great deal to offer, but returning to a man who treats her poorly is simply pathetic, regardless of who she is.


7. He Has No Redeeming Qualities

I'm not the sole person who shares this opinion. As a result of her relationship with this man, she has lost many friends, and even her family despises him. She's prioritizing a man who treats her with disrespect over everything and everyone else in her life, and I find it difficult to comprehend.

8. He'll Never Love Her The Way She Wants To Be Loved

My friend has an unrealistic expectation of romance, influenced by movies and dramas. She finds the ups and downs thrilling, hoping that they lead to a grand romantic gesture. She believes that he will eventually abandon his bad boy persona and become devoted to her. However, she's living in a fantasy, as the truth is that he's merely a self-centered jerk and will always be one.


9. She Doesn't Know How To Be On Her Own

To be honest, she has a fear of being alone. She's never been able to relish the single life and be self-sufficient. Whenever he exits her life, she has another guy lined up as a replacement. She always feels the need to have someone by her side, and that's why she can't seem to let him go.

10. She Doesn't See Herself The Way I See Her

If she had more self-awareness, I'm confident that she would never settle for a guy like him. She has a superficial sense of confidence that requires constant validation. Although she's intelligent, she lacks drive and ambition. Ultimately, she has yet to recognize her full potential, and until she does, she'll continue to settle for less than she deserves.


11. She Doesn't Realize That Sometimes Love Isn't Enough

No matter how much she may love him, it's irrelevant if that love isn't reciprocated in a meaningful way. It's painful to watch her repeatedly suffer, but it's important to acknowledge that she's ultimately causing herself this pain. Although she may have a sense that he'll never change, she hasn't yet fully grasped the idea that she won't find true happiness with a man who treats her poorly, no matter how deep her love for him may be.