mom-to-be and mother-in-law at loggerhead over pregnancy announcement on social media

Friction between mothers-in-law and their daughters-in-law is no news. There is even a dedicated community on Reddit for them, r/JUSTNOMIL, with 1.8 million subscribers.

One mom-to-be shared a story on this platform, detailing how she shared her pregnancy news on social media and how her mother-in-law reacted to it.

She started:

“I forgot the part where I needed permission to post on social media about my own child.”

Mom-to-be’s Pregnancy Announcement On Social Media Causes Friction With Mil
mom-to-be and mother-in-law at loggerhead over pregnancy announcement on social media

She shared the news of her pregnancy at 17 weeks into it. She did this after she went for a private scan and found out that she would be having a baby boy. First, she revealed the news to both grandparents via FaceTime using a gender reveal balloon.

With her all happy and having informed those closest to her and her husband, she bought cute little baby onesies and posted one of them along with the ultrasound.

Mom-to-be’s Pregnancy Announcement On Social Media Causes Friction With Mil
mom-to-be and mother-in-law at loggerhead over pregnancy announcement on social media

“Within the first minute of it being up, my partner said he hadn’t told everyone yet, so I asked him if he wanted me to take it down. He said no.”

Her husband had not informed other extended family members, which was why he mentioned that but he did not require her to take down the post.

Onto The MIL…

Mom-to-be’s Pregnancy Announcement On Social Media Causes Friction With Mil
mom-to-be and mother-in-law at loggerhead over pregnancy announcement on social media

“Que to his mum messaging me saying her family shouldn’t have to find out through social media. Now she’s messaging me telling me that my poor [husband] is stressed about work tomorrow so I should’ve waited.”

Mom-to-be’s Pregnancy Announcement On Social Media Causes Friction With Mil
mom-to-be and mother-in-law at loggerhead over pregnancy announcement on social media

It seems like there are rules to these things now. Her mother-in-law was pretty upset that she announced her pregnancy and baby’s gender without first consulting? Was she supposed to ask, “Is everyone in your family now aware so I can inform others?”

“It’s Your Moment”

Mom-to-be’s Pregnancy Announcement On Social Media Causes Friction With Mil
mom-to-be and mother-in-law at loggerhead over pregnancy announcement on social media

One commenter said:

“It’s your moment to be excited. Take it and enjoy it. Don’t let her ruin it. If she keeps up the madness, I’d put her on an info diet or blackout but that can be more stress than it’s worth. My sister gets all of her information from my mom when I’m pregnant because she cannot help but pick a fight with me.”

Although this might seem harsh, the commenter was speaking based on prior experience. Explaining why she deals with her sister that way, she said:

“With my first pregnancy announcement, she decided to tell me she might be pregnant too… and it was all a made-up story. People get strange with announcements about babies.”

Why Social Media Is Great For Sharing Such News

Mom-to-be’s Pregnancy Announcement On Social Media Causes Friction With Mil
mom-to-be and mother-in-law at loggerhead over pregnancy announcement on social media

You can’t call everyone. Social media is perfect for sharing such good news. How do you even call everyone to say ‘We’re pregnant. It’s a boy.”? To explain this, one person wrote:

“My MIL called us today to tell us that my BIL’s dog had passed away in the night, ‘so we didn’t have to find out on FB.’ I’ve met the dog twice. Yes, it is sad for them but it wasn’t phone call worthy either.”

Congratulations To The New Mom

Being a community solely dedicated to difficult in-laws, comments were sympathetic towards the new mom. One person told her to simply tell her MIL the following:

“Tell her your husband was fine with it. And if she has an issue, she should call her son, not you. Set those boundaries right now. Because if you don’t, she will be much worse when the baby comes. Oh and congrats!!!!”

Who do you stand with? The mom-to-be or the mother-in-law?