A mother wanted her daughter to have a girl-only fun time, so she asked another mom with her son to leave the park.
No matter how much we love being around our kids, sometimes we need and crave spending time with other parents or our agemates.
And the playground is a perfect place for us. It allows us to have adult conversations and talks we never thought we needed. We can take our children to the places they love and also invite our friends to join us with their kids.
But to ensure everyone spends quality time at the park, we need to prepare our kids in advance. We teach them how to conduct themselves and to socialize appropriately.
This’s because if you prepare for the event in advance, the playdate will turn out just fine.
One mother was seeking advice from Caroline Hax, an advice columnist at Washington Post Live. The mother explained that she had met up with other mothers at a public park, and all the moms had daughters.
But as everyone was having a good time, another mother came to the park, but she had a son.
The mother told Hax:
“I have a daughter, and some other moms of daughters and I have started getting together at a local playground at a set time each week. Recently a mom of a boy brought her son to the playground at the same time we were there.”
“I asked her (nicely, I thought) if she would mind leaving because we had wanted it to be a girls-only time.”
“She refused and seemed angry at me. If she comes back, is there a better way I can approach her? This has been such a sweet time for moms and daughters, and having a boy there is naturally going to change things.”
How’d you feel if you went to a park to have a good time with your son, then a mother you’ve never met comes and asks you to get out of the park?
Not great, I bet.
The mom continued:
“We live in a world where boys get everything and girls are left with the crumbs, and I would think this mom would realize that, but she seems to think her son is entitled to crash this girls-only time.”
“I know I can’t legally keep her from a public park, but can I appeal to her better nature?”
And Caroline Hax responded to the mother, saying that telling the mother to leave a public place was terrible.
“God help us all.”
“Shooing off the mom and her boy was terrible. And justifying it as a cosmic correction, for which an innocent child bears the weight?”
“That kid is a human being — not with privileged little man feelings, either, but with feelings, period. Perhaps even a disposition that fits better into your idea of girl behavior than some of the girls there. People are not widgets.”
“And the adult you shooed off is a mom, possessor of the same crumbs you’ve been fed, no? So don’t you think she would have just liked to hang with some fellow moms in the park?”
Hax also said that having adult time isn’t about girls or boys. It’s about mothers and no one should be excluded from a public park.
“I’d avoid you thereafter if it were my kids you boy-shamed … for wanting to play with girls, by the way. As if they were fellow people or something.”
“If you’re going to have an exclusive gathering, then host it on private property. And if you’re going to accuse anyone of being “entitled,” then ask yourself who just asked the world to bend to whom.”