Published in Sep 2020 / Updated in Aug 2021
I know we have discussed dating and relationships a gazillion times, but there is always one more issue to address. For instance, it’s one thing to get mixed signals from a girl at work. But what the hell does it mean when you get mixed signals from a girl with a boyfriend?
It’s confusing, right? Luckily, today we will help sort out this mess, but just to be clear, that’s generally not a good sign.
If she has a boyfriend, the best option is usually to back off. I understand that mixed signals in relationships exist, but this is different.
When a woman gives you mixed signals when she has a boyfriend or husband, there is clearly some trouble brewing, and you are about to get hurt. It doesn't matter if she will be to blame or not.
Girls are complicated, and everyone says that. And there’s a lot of truth to it. Why does a girl who clearly has another guy in her life give you the impression that she might be available to you?
Let’s find out why.
1. You Misunderstood Her Signals
I’m sorry to say this, but guys usually have a lot of trouble understanding a girl’s signals and tells. Usually, what seems like flirting is perfectly innocent, friendly behavior from the girl. And it does not indicate interest in a relationship or physical intimacy.
Maybe she touches your arm a lot when talking to you, which has made you think she might be interested. This does not necessarily mean she is interested in you, especially because she has a boyfriend.
That is why it’s always a good idea to ask her what she is up to and whether she is actually interested in you. Rather than assume and stress over it, ask her about her intentions and hear what she says.
And if you realize that you were wrong about her intentions, that is not a reason to end the friendship. Otherwise, knowing the truth early is very important to avoid getting hurt later on.
The things girls do to befriend you or seem friendly can easily be interpreted as flirting. At other times, the girl is just messing around with you, and nothing serious should be expected to come out of it.
To know if there is something serious going on, you can ask her out on a date. You can also suggest a desire for physical intimacy to know if she is really into you or just friendly and flirtatious.
2. She Is In An Open Relationship
Both girls and guys send mixed signals when trying to attract a new partner. If a girl sends mixed signals and you are sure she is interested in you on some level despite having a boyfriend, then she may be in an open relationship.
We live in a very liberal dating age, and open relationships are more common than ever. The social acceptability of these romantic arrangements means some people are still looking for lovers even though they already have another one in tow.
Obviously, the only way to know the truth is to ask.
If she has a boyfriend and clearly wants to start something with you, ask her if she might be in an open relationship. Once you know the truth, it’s up to you to decide if you are open to the idea or not.
3. She’s Greedy And Selfish
Some people demonstrate an interest in other people despite having partners because they are greedy. She might have a boyfriend, but still want attention from other guys. That is obviously not something an exclusive boyfriend would entertain.
This kind of situation can make you get into trouble with her boyfriend. You could also end up in a love triangle that sucks the life out of you.
Under these circumstances, it’s best to completely avoid the girl because you might get roped into an ugly relationship drama. And even if you win her, you will end up having to constantly worry about her doing the same to you the moment the passion in your relationship dies off a little.
If this girl tones down her flirting when around her boyfriend, but gets all touchy and seductive when he is away, then she is up to something.
Common mixed signals include being overly excited when you are around, chatting with you at night, going on dates with you, flirting with you, giving you lots of eye contact, and telling you she is interested in you romantically.
A girl can get stuck between two great guys. She can string you along because she is not sure who to pick. That is why she might give you enough signals to let you know she is interested even though she is clearly in another relationship.
But that does not make it right.
If she truly loved any of you, she would commit to a single partner. If she were in love with her boyfriend, she would not be confused about having you as a partner. Obviously, if she were sure about you, she would not be in another relationship.
This is a moral dilemma for her, but it’s not something you should hope will be resolved in your favor. It’s up to her to make a decision and make a stand.
If she has a boyfriend and does not respect him and her relationship enough to avoid flirting with you, then she will give you the same treatment the moment you end up together.
She is deliberately vague about her intentions because she does not think you are a risk worth taking. This girl wants you around just in case it does not work out.
Let’s face it; no one wants to be a backup plan. That's why you should get out before it’s too late.
5. She Is Unsure About You; Which Is Why She Sends Mixed Signals
When a girl, or a guy for that matter, is sure about you, she doesn’t keep her options open. We get that some relationships don’t work as well as we had hoped, and nobody should be blamed for it.
However, if she cannot move on completely and let you know she is fully available to you, that shows how unsure she is about you.
She is just as uncertain about you as she is about her boyfriend, and that’s never a good thing. Even if she eventually leaves her boyfriend for you, the chances are that she will flirt with someone else while she is with you.
There is a very good possibility that this is actually her pattern. This is very common with insecure girls who cannot be content with what they have.
Usually, getting in too deep with a girl who already has a boyfriend means ending up in a love triangle, and there is nothing pretty about that.
Some girls chase guys, and they can lead them on just for the heck of it. In these scenarios, it’s the guy who gets hurt.
If you are sure you are not misreading her signals, and that she is interested in you while she clearly has a boyfriend, then it’s best to keep the distance to avoid getting hurt.
Love triangles are humiliating and demeaning, and it’s no fun getting caught up in them, especially if you end up losing the girl to the other guy. That's why you should give girls with boyfriends who give you mixed signals a wide berth.