Men enjoy arguing and having sex with mentally unstable ladies, but not all is lost. A new study confirms that there's hope for long term relationships and sex. Check it out:
No wonder we can't agree on anything. Men like women who are into messy dramas, while women are attracted to guys who want to argue. And that's just the beginning. Well, at least according to the latest study published in the Journal of Sex Research.
The same German study claims that "men whose partners had less emotional stability reported better sexual function." This means that if you're acting a bit on the crazy side, there's a better chance of getting the guy. No more of all that "be yourself," guys want us to act anything but ordinary.
The role of mainstream media
That whole idea that the best sex comes from emotionally unstable women is a familiar scenario. Take "Fatal Attraction" and "Basic Instinct" into consideration. Then add every Woody Allen movie ever made, and you get the picture – mainstream media loves to represent women as crazy and crazy hot.
The other issue is that men like to save women. So, a guy can genuinely fall for an unstable woman, because he wants to help her, be her knight in shining whatever.
Women vs. men: expectations in bed
The German study included over 1000 participants, whose average age was 51, and they all had relationships for an average of 24 years. So, what is it that we want from sex, what's good sex?
For women, it includes sexual desire, satisfaction, arousal, and orgasm. For men, the main focus is on erectile function, passion, pleasure, and orgasm. But, unlike women, men are much more into pleasing their partners, which is an additional turn-on. Well, it's no surprise, guys are genuinely insecure, and ladies know that.
The good news
For couples, relationship duration was not linked to poor sexual function. It merely implies that you can be in a long term relationship and have great sex. It kind of makes sense, since you know each other, and you know what the other person likes or dislikes. Additionally, partners feel safer expressing their fantasies, deepest desires, which is against every Hollywood cliché.
The study also found that men had better sex with partners who had similar traits — specifically being easily stimulated. It may not seem like much, after learning that your man wants you to be a bit unstable, but it supports the theory that we do find mates in people who share interests. In and outside the bedroom.
German study proved that when it comes to relationships and sex, men are rather clueless. On the one hand, they want a partner in crime, someone who will understand and support them. On the other, they want emotionally unstable women. But let's see what that even means.
When a woman feels down, for whatever reason, she may want to have that angry sex, just to feel something other than sadness or anxiety. Furthermore, love tends to make us do crazy things, so sometimes ladies act a bit unusual due to the simple fact that they think or know that their guy is leaving. But, no, that won't make him stay, though it might give him the best orgasm of his life.
Healthy equals happy
No matter what our fantasies feel like, the bottom line is that both sexes should aim to have healthy, emotionally fulfilling relationships. Nothing guarantees longevity, but sex was always an intimate and profound expression of love.
Finding someone who's your buddy, your soulmate, and who's going to push you to get better in life is the ultimate goal. Great sex usually, but not always, comes with the territory.