I understand that it can be challenging for men to understand women's desires in bed, especially when they rely on sex advice from online sources, questionable pop culture trends, or their male friends who also base their sexual moves on what they see on the internet. Therefore, I would like to provide a list of things that many women could do without in the bedroom. Are you familiar with any of these?
1. Doing Instead Of Asking
If you're unsure whether what you're doing to us is pleasurable, don't hesitate to ask. It appears that some men believe that inquiring about a woman's preferences in bed implies a lack of sexual prowess. However, being skilled in bed primarily involves effective communication. I would bet that even Don Juan, the renowned lover, inquired of his partners, "Does it feel good when I perform this peculiar thumb maneuver?"
2. Slamming Your Pelvis Into Us With The Force Of Thor
While getting a little rough in bed can be enjoyable, there's one thing that's definitely not - a bruised pelvic bone. There's no reason to dive headfirst into our vagina and then relentlessly pound away with the force of an out-of-control jackhammer trying to break through concrete. Take things slow and steady. Allow yourself to build momentum gradually. We'll make it clear when we're ready for you to pick up the pace. We want our memories of sex with you to be pleasant, not ones that make us wince as we sit with an ice-pack on our crotch while watching House of Cards the next morning. This is a true story.
3. Only Doing It Doggy-style (or Any Other One Position)
While it may seem incredibly arousing when they do it from behind in all those RedTube videos, the reality is that the camera angles in those films make it appear that way. The fact is, not every woman is a fan of doggy style. While some women enjoy it, others find that it misses the mark entirely. That's why it's crucial to vary your positions and ask your partner what they prefer. By doing so, you can ensure that you both have a pleasurable experience.
4. Using Your Teeth In All The Wrong Places
While an unexpected love bite on the buttocks can be exciting, it's essential to be cautious when using your teeth. Not everyone enjoys being bitten, and in fact, some women despise it. Personally, I believe that nothing is worse than a man deciding to use his teeth during oral sex. This area is delicate, so treat it with care. Don't try to nibble on it like it's a corn cob you picked up at the state fair. Take this as a warning.
5. Doing that one thing that is sure to make us come… only to stop just when things are getting really good so you can do that other weird thing that makes us feel like we're being probed by aliens
I refer to this action as "the orgasm killer." If we're vocalizing our pleasure and telling you "don't stop" while you're performing a particular act, it's critical that you do not discontinue the activity under any circumstances. Whenever I attempt to explain this to men, they frequently reply, "But if you've already orgasmed, then I'll probably orgasm too." Isn't that the goal?
6. Getting Kinky Right Away
Despite the widespread popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey, it's a mistake for men to believe that every woman wants to be handcuffed, tied up, spanked, and choked. While some women may enjoy these activities, many of us prefer to feel comfortable with a partner before sharing our fantasies. Trying to introduce kink too early in a relationship can be a major turn-off. It's critical to obtain consent, so don't reach for those handcuffs until we've had a discussion and given you the go-ahead.