The dating tactic of playing hard to get has been a long-standing advice given to women. From a young age, we've been taught not to appear too available or easy to guys, for fear of losing their interest. However, instead of playing hard to get, a better option is to use the technique of mirroring.
1. Guys Shouldn't Have To Do All The Chasing
Many of us are fed up with the constant waiting game in dating, particularly when it comes to men taking the lead. We've become accustomed to waiting for them to ask us out, start a text conversation, and declare their interest in a committed relationship. Frankly, it's tiring and feels unfair.
2. Playing Hard To Get Stems From Uneven Power Dynamics
Historically, women have employed the tactic of playing hard to get to convey that we are not too easily won over by a man, fearing that showing too much interest may turn him off. However, this strategy is not foolproof, as some men may interpret our behavior as disinterest and lose interest themselves. Additionally, this approach relinquishes control to men and forces us to wait for them to make a move, which is not ideal. Thus, it's not a viable option.
3. Pretending To Be Unavailable Rarely Achieves The desired Effect
While playing hard to get may effectively filter out toxic men, it can also lead to misunderstandings with well-intentioned men. A genuinely nice guy may interpret our behavior as a lack of interest or an attempt to push him away, causing him to abandon his pursuit prematurely before it has a chance to develop.
4. Being Hot And Cold With A Guy Is Confusing And Kind Of Cruel
Sending mixed signals by being affectionate one minute and distant the next can create confusion and uncertainty. It's best to be clear about your feelings from the outset to establish where you stand. Ultimately, you wouldn't appreciate it if a man behaved in this manner towards you, so it's essential to treat others how you'd like to be treated.
5. Contrary To Popular Belief, Decent Guys Don't Actually Like Playing Games
It may come as a surprise to some, but most men don't enjoy playing games or dealing with unnecessary drama. If a guy feels that a woman is playing games or difficult to handle, he's likely to lose interest and move on from the situation.
6. Try Mirroring: For Every Move A Guy Makes, You Should Reciprocate With One Of Your Own
Relationship experts suggest that in modern-day dating, both men and women should take initiative to advance the relationship. Once a couple has made their commitment official, it is expected to be an equitable partnership, requiring both parties to put in equal effort from the beginning.
7. It's Important To Take The Lead Sometimes
It's not necessary to take charge all the time, but it's important to demonstrate that you're a team player in the relationship. Don't rely solely on the man to do all the work. If he asked you out on the first date, consider asking him out on the second date. Taking the lead on occasion can help eliminate any passive-aggressive behavior towards dating and set the tone for a healthy relationship.
8. If You're Interested, You Should Show It
Although it may contradict what we were previously taught about dating and our perceptions of men, the key is to reciprocate each other's dating efforts. Don't diminish or minimize your feelings in any capacity. In today's dating world, honesty and openness are crucial throughout the entire process.
9. Women Who Put Themselves Out There As Much As They Want Guys To Are A Breath Of Fresh Air
Just as we dislike being left in the dark, men also appreciate knowing where they stand in a relationship. A woman who is upfront and honest about her intentions is more likely to be pursued by a man than someone who plays games or is ambiguous about her feelings. Honesty is a refreshing and attractive quality.
10. A Relationship That's A 50/50 Effort Stands A Much Better Chance Of Lasting
In essence, a relationship is more likely to endure when both parties invest equal effort and view it as a 50/50 partnership from the outset. It's a logical approach, isn't it?