Meeting a guy who is honest and clear about the relationship is certainly a breath of fresh air. However, it's important to remember that just because he is kind and treats us with basic respect, it doesn't automatically make him worthy of adoration. It's time for us women to take these men off the pedestal they've been placed on.
1. We deserve those great behaviors and more
While it's wonderful that the guy is attentive and rushes to our side when we're having a bad day or remembers our coffee preferences, we shouldn't put him on a pedestal and worship him. We deserve a sweet and attentive partner, and even more than that. Although he's great, he's not the best thing since sliced bread.
2. We shouldn't sell ourselves short
When we idealize and put our partner on a pedestal, we diminish ourselves in the process. It's possible to even start thinking that he's too good for us and we don't deserve him, which is complete nonsense. We're just as wonderful as he is, and it's essential to elevate ourselves to that same pedestal.
3. We shouldn't act like good guys are an almost-extinct species
It can be challenging to come across a genuinely good guy out there. It often feels like at every corner, there's a toxic and emotionally unavailable man who only wants to hurt us or play games with love. However, the truth is, there are still good guys out there, so there's no need to act like meeting one is a miracle. It's not!
4. We should believe in our worth
When we hype up a new guy we're dating simply because he doesn't treat us poorly, we inadvertently suggest that we don't deserve someone who treats us like royalty, which is far from the truth. We should start believing that we deserve better and stop settling for less. This means not treating a guy who does the bare minimum to impress us as if he's some extraordinary being.
5. We should know he's a dime a dozen
A guy who only does the bare minimum is not particularly remarkable. While he might have great potential as a partner, he still needs to earn our love and trust. We shouldn't fall for someone just because they pull out a chair for us at a restaurant or are polite to our mother. It takes much more than that to win our hearts.
6. We shouldn't chase anybody
Putting a guy on a pedestal can make us feel like we've found a rare gem and need to chase him to secure the relationship, which is a problematic approach. Just because a guy has impressed us by doing the bare minimum doesn't mean we should act desperate around him. If he doesn't text back or ask us out despite being charming, it's possible that he wasn't that great to begin with. It's better to see the reality than look at him through rose-tinted glasses.
7. We don't need lazy guys
If we swoon over a guy who only does the bare minimum, we may end up falling for someone who puts in little effort but still gets us to praise him. Eventually, he might realize he doesn't have to do much to earn our love and attention. However, it's important to make it clear that he needs to continue working hard to keep us, even after we become his girlfriend.
8. We should accept — and expect — love
Dating in today's world can be challenging. People often label us as too intense when we want to DTR and find real love. However, we shouldn't let that discourage us. We know what we want, and we should go after it without fear. Rather than swooning over a guy who only gives us small tokens of affection, we should be proud to accept and expect that a genuine guy will shower us with love. Respect and loyalty are the bare minimum we should expect from a partner.
9. We need to receive what we give
While relationships aren't necessarily about keeping score, it definitely makes them more enjoyable when our partner meets us halfway instead of leaving all the heavy lifting to us. Doing the bare minimum might impress us initially, like when we realize some guys don't use their phones during dates, but it won't be enough in the long run. We'll eventually want more, especially if we're putting in a lot of effort. And that's only fair, right?
10. Nice is not always enough
Dating toxic guys can make us overly excited when we finally meet a genuinely nice guy. But is being "nice" really that special? We shouldn't overlook other qualities just because he's nice to us. We could miss out on a truly fabulous guy who's not only nice, but also interesting, kind, and more.