Just Because I Do Not Need A Husband Does Not Mean I Never Want One

Currently, there is a growing trend among women to choose not to get married or to discuss the reasons why marriage may not be necessary. Although I fully support a woman's decision not to marry, personally, I still aspire to walk down the aisle with my lifelong partner in the future. Is there anything incorrect with this?

1. My parents have a sucky marriage and it doesn't have to be that way

My parents had a distant relationship and often quarreled, but I had friends whose parents had a loving and harmonious marriage. As a result, I believe that successful marriages are possible, and I desire to experience one myself. Marriage is often criticized because people may enter into it for the wrong reasons or lack compatibility, but I am motivated by love, not money or convenience like my parents.

2. It's a form of ultimate commitment

Getting someone to commit to even a casual meet-up after work is challenging in today's society, let alone marriage. Many millennials seem uninterested in taking such a significant step. However, I believe that the magnitude of this commitment makes it essential and meaningful. Marriage has consequences and is one of the most profound forms of commitment for our generation. Personally, I view it as a beautiful and sincere way to demonstrate our love and devotion to each other.

3. Doing life with someone who has no legal commitment to me makes me nervous

Although I do not need to be legally married to have children, cohabit, or share finances with someone, I prefer to have the legal protections that come with marriage. In the event that things go wrong or one of us passes away, I do not want to be in a vulnerable position. Our state and federal laws acknowledge the significance of contractual marriages and provide them with legal safeguards and special treatment regarding taxes, healthcare, health insurance, inheritance, and other matters. This recognition is due to the fact that marriage involves deeply personal aspects that must be taken seriously. Until our customs and laws change, I choose to adhere to tradition.

4. I don't need a marriage to raise a family, but I want to try to be in one anyway

Regardless of whether children in households with low-conflict married parents fare better than other children, I would still prefer to have children within a marriage initially. I value the idea that my children will have the opportunity to grow up in a household where both parents live under the same roof. Furthermore, unlike my own parents, I am aware of when my attempts to keep the family together might not align with my children's best interests. Additionally, like many individuals in our generation, I am adept at ending a situation that no longer serves me.

5. My feminist values don't fall away just because I want marriage

As a modern woman, I support the pursuit of gender equality. I also believe that women can assume the role of breadwinners in a marriage. I am of the opinion that it is feasible to contemporize traditional institutions.

6. Marriage isn't where independence goes to die

Wanting to get married does not imply a loss of independence. Marriage as an institution does not necessitate forfeiting independence. Preserving one's independence is crucial for any successful relationship. Choosing to enter into a lifelong committed legal marriage does not immediately erode one's independence.

7. I believe in the fairytale—why is that so wrong?

What's wrong with believing in fairy tales? Perhaps my parents' tumultuous marriage has made me cynical, and I want to hold onto the hope that a perfect marriage with all the trimmings is possible. Although I am aware that marriage requires hard work, I still want to believe that a loving and happy marriage is entirely achievable.

8. I think that being someone's wife would be cool

Honestly, I genuinely believe in it! The idea of coming home to the same person for the rest of my life, someone who loves me, supports me, and prioritizes our relationship, sounds absolutely wonderful to me.

9. Just because I want marriage doesn't mean I'm not aware of the risks

I understand that people can change, and love can fade. Someone who seemed like the perfect match can turn into someone completely different. I acknowledge that my dream marriage could turn into a nightmare, and divorce may be necessary. However, I believe the potential benefits of marriage far outweigh the risks, making it a worthwhile risk to take.