If You're Sending Me These 11 Texts Before Our First Date, It's Not Going To Happen

Previously, I attempted to limit my texting before a first date in order to have more to discuss with the person during our actual meeting. However, I've come to realize that texting can be useful in gauging a person's character and determining whether it's worth my time to pursue a relationship with them. If you send me the following texts before our first date, it will become clear to me that it's best to cancel our plans and stay home in my pajamas:

1. "Send me a pic"

If we connected through the internet or mutual acquaintances, you already have an idea of my appearance. So, if you're requesting additional pictures, it's apparent that you're solely interested in receiving nudes, which is unacceptable. Sending unsolicited explicit images, particularly of your genitals, is even worse. Your behavior is disappointing, especially since everything was going well until you ruined it.

2. "What are you up to?" times three

While it's acceptable to send a message inquiring about my day or what I'm up to, it becomes bothersome when this occurs frequently. It feels as though you're attempting to engage in conversation but are unable to think of anything compelling to discuss. Instead, it's preferable to refrain from messaging altogether. Furthermore, since we're not in a relationship yet, please avoid behaving like my significant other by frequently checking in.

3. "Can I come over now?"

If you send me an impromptu text message days before our planned meeting, it's evident that you're only interested in a casual hookup. It's possible that you've had a change of heart regarding our date, or perhaps you've stumbled upon something more appealing and think you can still fit me in for a quick fling. Unfortunately, that's not an option for me.

4. "My friends are dying to meet you"

Wait a minute. You've been discussing me with your friends to the point where they want to meet me, despite us not even having gone on a date yet? That's moving too quickly for my liking, and I need to put the brakes on this situation.

5. "Thinking of you…"

Your messages seem excessively romantic and give the impression of desperation. Please try to relax and avoid coming across as too eager.

6. "You there?"

If you ask if I'm still online just because I haven't replied quickly enough, it's excessive. Please relax and understand that I'm not always available to respond immediately. Your clinginess before our first date is not a good sign, and I'm concerned about how it would be if we were in a relationship. I don't think I'm interested anymore.

7. "Check out my band/company page/self-published book"

The shameless plug is a turn-off. Whether you're bragging about your accomplishments or trying to mix business with pleasure, it's too much too soon. We can discuss our work and achievements, but asking me to check out your work before we've even met is excessive. I don't need to see your post-graduate degree just yet.

8. "What's your bra size?"

Asking for a bra size is as inappropriate as requesting naked pictures. If your focus is on physical attributes such as this, it's evident that we have different priorities and are not on the same page. While you're seeking something physical, I'm interested in more meaningful connections.

9. "I'm not looking for anything serious, but I really want to meet you!"

Your messages are contradictory, and it's confusing to know your intentions. If you're not interested in a relationship, then there's no point in meeting up. Your eagerness to meet me feels like you're settling for a consolation prize, hoping for a physical connection. I don't want to waste my time if that's the case.

10. "Where do you wanna meet?"

It's thoughtful for a guy to consider my preferences when choosing a date location, but it's also attractive when he takes the initiative. I expect him to suggest a place for us to meet instead of leaving all the planning to me. If he doesn't, it makes me question his enthusiasm for the date and whether he's genuinely interested in me. I want to be with someone who's eager to meet me and excited about spending time together.

11. "I have a great idea for our second date"

It's premature to talk about a second date when you don't even know what the first one will be like. Jumping ahead like that comes across as desperate and insulting, suggesting that you assume I'll be so impressed by you that I'll want to see you again. However, this text has already made me reconsider our first date, and a second one is out of the question.