It’s one of the universal truths of life. Like the inevitability complex – for all that police and taxes will always be a part of life, so will assholes. Assholes who will never prioritize your time over theirs. 

These sorry excuses for relationships will be conducted out of the emotional garage of an immature boy who wants friends with benefits on his own convoluted terms. He isn’t equipped to be in a long term relationship but makes no effort to grow.

The killer sign of this is when his main mode of communication is a text sent from his childhood room at his parents’ house at 3 am.

‘U up’ isn’t exactly Wordsworthian, is it?

Sometimes I think that the romantic poets who composed poems and sonnets for their lovers in the days of old would have an aneurism at the state of affairs in the modern world. But oh well, the ‘social media signals the end of times’ speech can come later on. 

Social media is not what I blame this asshole on. No, this is all his own doing. He knows exactly what he’s doing too. He knows that he’s on Facebook while he ignores your calls and messages. Responding to your huge message with ‘k’ cannot be operable any longer.

If nothing else, it’s rude. Much less than it’s directed at a person to whom he is supposedly meant to have a connection. It just means that he refuses to compromise, and that’s a big no-no in relationships. 

The fact that you would drop everything at a moment’s notice to help him or get to his house for a hook-up, but he hasn’t met any of your friends yet, is another red flag. You can soon get trapped looking for kernels of love that he accidentally drops here and there. 

Just enough to string you along, and then you get used to it.

Before you know it you’re on a rollercoaster of emotional stagnancy and it’s so hard to recognize you deserve more and get off. 

You start to rank all your self worth in relation to his interest that day. Like the Glee quote, ‘I would count all the days you smiled at me, and die on the days that you didn’t’.

To say that you are so negatively impacted by the stress of his casual relationship, the most frustrating thing is that he isn’t even aware of how destructive his habits are. 

You become a pawn in his game. Only activated when he wants you. Meanwhile, you come to rely on him, mostly in his absence. This asshole will know you for months and months and still not give you the basic respect of asking if you want to go on a date. 

Or even mix things up a bit and go to his – nope, it’s always at yours.

You have to take his word for everything, and he never shows you any gestures of affection. He wouldn’t go out of his way to impress you, he takes you for granted. 

He’s always on his phone when you’re with him, and yet you can never get hold of him on his when you’re apart. Double standard much? He not only isn’t there for you when not convenient to him but seems to actively avoid your contact. 

That’s ridiculous when you think about it, but sometimes you need a friend to tell you this. Well, let me be the third party voice of reason to remind you that this isn’t normal! 

No relationship is inconvenient if both people want to make it work, remember that. If you love someone, nothing is too inconvenient that can’t be compromised or discussed. 

He’s just an asshole, and not worth your time. Get yourself someone who is willing to make it work, prioritize you, and will not make you question your worth or convenience.