If This Is Really How We Date Now, I Am Not Interested

I might be mistaken, but it seems to me that dating was more fulfilling in the past. According to the stories I've heard from previous generations, people experienced genuine love, and partners understood they needed to put in effort for their relationships to thrive. Nowadays, something about dating just doesn't feel right. If these issues with contemporary dating are as prevalent as they seem to be, I would prefer to remain single.

1. We've killed the romance

Do you recall the last time a man asked you out on a real date, put in the genuine effort, took you somewhere special, and didn't attempt to have sex with you? I don't. Dating feels increasingly mechanized. Swipe, message, meet, have sex, and move on to the next. It's as though we're on a production line instead of a journey to find the right person.

2. We don't establish real connections

With countless options at our fingertips, it's difficult to give someone the time and attention they truly deserve. Our interactions have become superficial, and we're hesitant to delve deeper. Technology and hookup culture have made dating more convenient, but they've also made it shallower.

3. We order people like we order pizza

Seeking love? No worries, a few swipes, some carefully crafted banter, and voila! The sheer quantity of online dating options available today can be overwhelming. Even if meaningful relationships develop from this, we're still essentially online shopping for love.

4. We hide how we truly feel

In this era, it's all about not caring and being the "cool girl." If we don't care, we're deemed more "chill," but if we do care, we're labeled as "crazy." We're afraid of revealing our true selves to someone and having them dislike what they see. So instead, we hide our emotions and keep our hearts guarded. This might shield us from rejection, but ultimately, it's self-sabotage in the long run.

5. We're careless with other people's hearts

We engage in mind games. We approach dating selfishly, prioritizing our own desires without considering the potential harm we might cause to others. Having been hurt in the past, we're convinced that the only way to safeguard ourselves is to hurt others before they hurt us. It's a destructive cycle, and it doesn't appear to be ending anytime soon.

6. We can't stop comparing our relationships to others

While Facebook and Instagram are fantastic platforms, they only display people's best moments. We're shown the joyful experiences of couples, rather than the disagreements, hardships, or tears that inevitably come with even the strongest relationships. As a result, we compare the reality of our dating lives to what we see in others' lives, yearning for something that isn't actually genuine.

7. We're always looking for something more

We're always on the lookout for someone better than our current partner. Regardless of how attractive, intelligent, and loyal our significant other may be, we're often fixated on the prospect of someone else being a better fit. We've forgotten the significance of being satisfied and appreciative. Unfortunately, we often only realize the value of what we have when it's too late.

8. We aren't sincere

We utter meaningless words without any regard for their impact. We'll do and say anything to achieve our goals, especially after it's been done to us. We've been taught that dishonesty is the easiest path to fulfillment in our romantic lives, causing us to adopt the same practices that have previously been used to hurt us.

9. We want the illusion of a relationship rather than the reality

We eagerly welcome the romance, joy, and sweet talk, but we reject the difficulties that come with a relationship. We assume that the relationship will be effortless because dating was so effortless, but that's not the case. While we may like the appearance of a relationship, when faced with its realities, many of us give up.

10. We pretend like we don't want a relationship even when we actually do

Hookup culture has persuaded us to deceive ourselves. We believe that it's preferable to have no emotional ties, that being in a genuine relationship just isn't trendy. However, in reality, we do desire that kind of affection. We yearn for a unique bond with someone special, but many of us continue to deceive ourselves to avoid getting hurt when we start developing feelings for someone.