It’s probably one of those silly super sweet things that kind of go without saying, but if you haven’t, listen! If they’re excited to love you and shower you with attention, that’s good!

We don’t need to play hard to get anymore. It’s 2020, we’re all closer to thirty than we’d like. It’s time to start figuring out what we want and sticking to our guns. 

That means that when we see what we like, we go out there and commit to it. If a man that we are attracted to, can hold a conversation with, and really gel with comes along, why not give it a whirl?

What have you got to lose?

This isn’t a gesture of desperation either. Or lack of options. It’s just a statement of intent. 

Intent that you know you deserve better than the playboy commitment-phobes that normally come your way. If a nice guy – as distinct from a self-identifying Nice Guy – comes along, give them the time of day. 

You never know what new and fun connections are waiting for you with so many guys excited to love you. Love shouldn’t ever be a chore. If it feels like a chore you’re probably doing it wrong. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.

I know why it can be confusing though. Sometimes we’re all taught that everyone will reject the ‘real us’ and that life is hard and difficult and always a struggle.

Well, yes, that’s true some of the time.

But we can’t all be such hard-boiled cynics to think that we don’t have our own worth that people all the time see without us having to change to fit someone else’s arbitrary standards.

That would be no fun whatsoever. So trust me, if someone says that they fancy you and they aren’t actively holding a chainsaw, it’s probably safe to listen to them.

I know we all need to be cautious and sensible going on dates and negotiating online dating profiles, that’s perfectly reasonable. But don’t ingrain that to such an extent that you never believe anyone showing interest is genuine. 

Just because some men are trash doesn’t mean that they all are. I know, it’s crazy, right? I mean, I’m not a ‘men’s rights apologist’ or anything, don’t get me wrong. But sometimes you have to look around you with more open eyes. 

The world isn’t out to get you.

Yes, you don’t owe the world anything, but the people around you are ready and excited to love you, you just have to believe them. Give them a chance. 

There’s realistic, but then there’s overly cautious. Trust your gut, but if a guy is reading your signals, sending good morning messages and tagging you in cute facebook memes, isn’t that good news? Surely!

It’s not 2012 Tumblr anymore, we don’t need a broody, mysterious man of ageless wonder. Tim from down the road may not cut it but Michael from work is super cute and asked you on a date last week to that restaurant you both love. 

It’s not ‘too easy’ or automatically suspicious if a guy is attuned to your needs and wants. You deserve that as a base level of a relationship. You shouldn’t expect them to always drop everything for you, but the fact that they do sometimes is not a red flag.

In fact, it’s the opposite.

We all have to grow more aware of how excellent we are. How worthy of attention and love. Being prioritized is not the gold standard, unattainable and seen only in romcoms. 

It does happen in reality, don’t mistrust it when it does!