If you ask a man a straightforward question, he should respond directly, but unfortunately, some men struggle with effective communication. For instance, when you inquire whether he is prepared to commit to a relationship with you, a straightforward "yes" or "no" would suffice, but instead, he chooses to say, "It's complicated." However, in reality, the situation is not complicated at all, and the truth is that he is acting selfishly and disrespectfully.
1. He Doesn't Want To Let Go Of His Options
This Lothario fancies himself as a smooth operator, charming the ladies and enjoying life to the fullest, and in his mind, you're simply one of many conquests. He believes that committing too soon is a missed opportunity and instead prefers casual flings that allow him to pursue multiple women. To avoid admitting the truth about his reluctance to commit, he tries to make you believe that he's confused. However, he's underestimating your intelligence, and it's a shame that he's doing so. You're well aware that the only complexity in this situation is how misguided his fantasy truly is.
2. He Puts His Own Feelings First, Always
There are some men who genuinely believe that everything in the world revolves around them. These individuals view their own desires and requirements as the top priority at all times. They have no qualms about diagnosing themselves with "complicated feelings" if they believe that it will enable them to evade a commitment. Moreover, it's not just you who's hearing these excuses - he's using them on every woman he's involved with.
3. He's A Total Cliche
It's quite cringeworthy how similarly guys articulate their position, and it would be more tolerable if they tried to vary their language somewhat. Additionally, why do they all put on that fake-serious demeanor when reciting those tired phrases that seem to be universal among them? It's almost as if they're following some sort of "boys-only" manual on how to communicate.
4. If He Cared About You, He'd Take His Uncertainty Elsewhere
Even if you're a complete badass, not every man will be smitten with you, and that's perfectly fine. Let's face it, there are probably some fantastic men out there who don't strike your fancy either. Nonetheless, it's only a sleazy man who hangs around, reaping the benefits of your company without reciprocating. The next time he starts hesitating and making excuses about how he's grappling with his emotions, perhaps you should suggest that he takes some time to re-center himself in an ashram and, most importantly, stays the heck out of your bed.
5. If He Wanted To, He Could Be Confused And Still Be Committed
Let's face it - everyone's emotions are complex. The human experience has never been straightforward. Therefore, when he becomes agitated and begins spouting off those justifications, what he's essentially conveying is, "I don't possess the finesse and intelligence required to manage a real relationship with a woman. The only way I can do this is if you agree not to make any demands on me whatsoever." How charming, right?
6. He Would Never Wait Around For You If Things Got "complicated" On Your End
It's only fair to give him the benefit of the doubt and see if he's capable of being a decent guy. Therefore, feel free to use his own flimsy excuses against him the next time you meet him. "I'm sorry, darling. Having sex with you is incredibly complicated. I can't keep engaging in meaningless hookups with you, but if you want to continue treating me to occasional dinners and concerts, we can discuss it further." Then observe how long he remains interested in you.
7. Complicated Situations Do Happen But This Probably Isn't One Of Them
When a man expresses his reservations, he should provide a comprehensive explanation and seek your opinion. As a team, the two of you should then decide whether to continue with the relationship despite the obstacles. What he must not do is mumble some indistinct excuse about being in a peculiar headspace and wanting to keep things non-committal.
8. "It's Complicated" Is A Catchall Excuse
Let's face it, if women are unable to justify their actions by blaming PMS (which is genuinely a valid issue), then men should not be allowed to excuse their behavior by citing "complicated feelings" (which are actually nonsense). If he merely wants a physical relationship, he should be honest with you. Make him meet you on equal terms.
9. He's Not "bad" But He's Bad For You
Now that we've criticized him enough, let's take it easy on him. This man is not fundamentally terrible (honestly) - he's self-centered, but not necessarily cruel. If you were interested in something brief and non-committal, he would be a perfect fit for you. However, since you've attempted to have an honest conversation with him, it implies that you're looking for something deeper. The straightforward reality is that he isn't going to provide that for you.
10. Backing Away Can Be Difficult
If we always evaluated men based on their consistency of character and willingness to be a partner, we would all be in our ideal relationships, but that's not the case. We sometimes develop feelings for fickle, unreliable players. Maybe the thought of being the woman to change his ways excites you. Or maybe he has an attractive physique. You see him for what he is, but something is still keeping you in this unworkable situation. Sadly, your decision is quite straightforward: abandon him and preserve your self-respect or settle for his unsatisfactory conditions and remain only partially happy. No one ever said that simple decisions are easy.
11. You Deserve So Much More
Choosing to end things with him can be scary, but it's the right choice for your future. Finding love often requires taking a leap of faith, and even in fairytales, the princesses face challenges before reaching their happy ending. Don't let a selfish guy who can't commit bring you down.