I Use Guys For Sex & I'm Not Ashamed Of It

It may appear unkind to enter a relationship with the sole intention of using someone for sexual pleasure, but that is my personal approach and I do not feel remorse for it.

1. It makes me feel empowered and in control

I am tired of feeling uncertain and anxious after engaging in a sexual relationship with someone. Constantly wondering if they have feelings for me or if they will reach out again, makes me feel foolish and I dislike that. As a result, I have chosen to take control of the situation and have the power to decide the terms of the relationship, which feels empowering.

2. I get used for sex all the time

I have had enough of being mistreated and taken advantage of. After being relegated to a secondary role for so long, I am now going to do the same to the men in my life. In my youth, I did not know any better, but now that I am older, I believe that I have earned the right to make men wonder about my intentions and whether I will reach out again. I have no guilt or remorse about it.

3. If guys can do it, women can too

It is unjust that society often views men as able to engage in casual sexual relationships without judgment, while women who do the same thing are labeled as promiscuous. This stereotype is unfair, as it suggests that women are emotionally attached to their partners after engaging in sexual acts while men aren't. In reality, both men and women are capable of separating their emotions from physical intimacy.

4. They don't seem to mind

Many men appear to be accustomed to the idea of short-term, casual relationships and are often accepting when I express that I am not interested in anything beyond sexual encounters with them. While not all men may have this mindset, many seem to be relieved when I make it clear that I am not seeking a commitment or to limit their freedom.

5. I don't necessarily want to date every guy I sleep with

I am using men for their physical attributes in the same way that some men may use me for my body. In fact, I will go as far as to say that if I am using someone, it is because I am not fond of their personality or compatibility for a long-term relationship. This is why I choose to engage in sexual encounters and not pursue a romantic relationship. Some individuals are suitable for sexual encounters, some for relationships, and some for both. I am not going to let go of a potential sexual partner just because we don't have a romantic connection. I am not going to waste a good opportunity.

6. I avoid all the drama that comes with sex

By only engaging in sexual relationships with men, I avoid any confusion or uncertainty about the nature of our relationship. There are no questions about commitment, exclusivity or competing interests. The dynamic is purely enjoyable because we both understand that it is short-term. This way, the focus is on what sex should be, uncomplicated, casual and without any added stress.

7. Sometimes I just want to get off

Is it immoral to desire sexual intimacy without the expectation of a romantic relationship? If I encounter a willing partner, I will not hesitate to engage with them. At times, I may not have a romantic interest in my life but that doesn't mean that I should abstain from sexual encounters. There are many individuals who are comfortable with being used for sexual purposes and I should not be hesitant to pursue what I want.

8. I need my own space

Sometimes in my life, I prefer to be alone, but that doesn't mean I have to abstain from sexual encounters. When I communicate to a partner that I wish to maintain a purely physical relationship, they usually understand. Being alone is not always necessary, but during times when I am feeling overwhelmed or uncertain about my life, I find that casual sex is all I can manage.

9. I want to focus on my career

Instead of wasting my time and energy on unsuccessful romantic relationships, I limit my involvement to sexual encounters, allowing me to focus on other important aspects of my life in my mid-twenties. While healthy relationships can be enjoyable, I believe that I have ample time for that later in life. Using men for sex is currently a convenient choice for me and I do not plan to change my approach in the near future.

10. Guys can get hurt later on if I don't draw the line

When I am aware that a man I am engaging in sexual relations with is only interested in a short-term, physical relationship, it is important that I communicate this to him as soon as possible. This way, he will not develop deeper feelings for me and potentially avoid getting hurt in the future. Though it may seem blunt to say "I am not interested in dating you, but I am interested in hooking up", it is ultimately a kinder approach in the long run.