Following the end of a long-term relationship, I decided to venture into the world of dating multiple men at once, without committing to any one of them exclusively. This lasted around two months, during which I was involved with up to four men simultaneously. However, I was upfront with each of them about the nature of our relationship. Personally, I found it too challenging to balance multiple relationships at once, but if you can handle it, more power to you!
1. Having A "Type" Came Back To Bite Me
I'm not referring to physical attributes when discussing my preferred "type" - although I do tend to prefer men with brown hair. Rather, I'm drawn to men who work in sales, marketing, or business development. Unbeknownst to me, I was seeing two men who were actually coworkers while I was dating multiple people. They eventually found out about each other and sent me a Snapchat of them together, which was embarrassing. We had a brief, awkward laugh before I made my escape.
2. I Started To Bore Myself
On initial dates, the conversation usually revolves around the basics such as your occupation, hometown, etc. To add some amusement, I used to narrate entertaining stories that made people laugh. But as I repeated these stories to different partners, it started feeling dull. I would even forget who had heard which anecdotes, and they would remind me by saying, "Yeah, you told me that before."
3. My Self-Care Went Out The Window
Managing my own schedule was challenging, let alone managing someone else's, and even more so when it involved multiple people. I already struggled to find time to sleep sufficiently, which was crucial for me. I barely had any time to unwind, and whenever I did, it was interrupted by texting these men, and there were several of them. Adding up the time spent talking felt like a second job.
4. My Skin Is Too Sensitive To Shave Every Other Day
This one is all about logistics. During the summer season, wearing jeans on dates in the city was out of the question. It was a Catch-22 situation: Either endure the discomfort of razor-burn by shaving twice as much or show up to the date drenched in sweat.
5. I 100% Gained Weight As A Result Of Dating Multiple People
During that period, most of my dates involved eating and drinking. We would go to restaurants, attend food festivals, and watch movies. Consequently, my calorie intake skyrocketed due to the combination of casual beers and fancy dinners, and I exercised less frequently as I was preoccupied. Although I could have opted for healthy food choices, I knew that I could not resist cheesy foods, and it was easy to give in to them.
6. I Had To Give Them All Nicknames
Describing my romantic affairs to my friends became confusing, especially when I was seeing two people with the same name. I had to resort to referring to them like characters in "Friends" episodes. For instance, The One From Miami, The One With the Pit Bull, The One Who Ran Marathons, among others. Not only was it challenging to keep track of everyone, but it also made me feel detached from my dating life.
7. I Was Always Afraid Of Seeing Them Where I Least Expected It
Whenever I was out with one of my dates, I worried about running into the others. Even when I was not with any of them, I had a constant fear of encountering them unexpectedly. It felt like I had five romantic satellites moving around, and I never knew where they would be or when. Although the probability of that happening was low, the thought still lingered.
8. It Felt Like Emotional Whiplash
Going on second and third dates, I found myself at different paces with each person. It was exhausting trying to balance a connection with one while the other lagged behind. This stress affected my mood and energy, ultimately causing all the relationships to end.
9. Read That Again: All The Relationships Ended
Juggling multiple relationships had numerous negative effects, resulting in the demise of each one. Over a few weeks, they all fizzled out, with me ending some and having several "I don't see this going anywhere" conversations. To make matters worse, the guy I liked ended things because he didn't feel prioritized.
10. I Don't Know How Contestants On The Bachelorette Do It
Dating multiple guys left me feeling drained, guilty, and unlike myself. It took me months to even consider dating again, and when I did, I only focused on two things: myself and a guy I liked.