As a hopeless romantic, I tend to become overly enthusiastic when a new guy comes into my life. Despite my high standards for liking someone, I tend to idealize things more than necessary. However, I have learned my lesson, and I have decided not to take a guy seriously until I know that he is equally serious about me. The reason for this is as follows:
1. I know better now
In the past, I used to believe that a guy's nonchalant attitude towards my feelings was a reflection of my inadequacies. However, I now understand that his behavior has nothing to do with me but is solely about him. If a guy is genuinely interested in me, treating me with the respect and consideration I deserve will come naturally to him. If not, then he's not worth my time and energy.
2. I Am choosing to be realistic
I have come to realize that not every guy I like will reciprocate my feelings. Rather than forcing a relationship with someone who cannot see my value or treat me appropriately, I have chosen to accept the reality and move on. Waiting for him to change or treat me better is futile, and I prefer not to waste my time on such endeavors.
3. Some people don't deserve the benefit of the doubt
I no longer make excuses for a guy's unacceptable behavior. I refuse to tolerate mistreatment or settle for something mediocre just to maintain a relationship. Taking people at face value entails accepting when a guy shows me that he is not suitable as a boyfriend. It is not my duty to decipher his actions or presume that he wants a relationship when his behavior suggests otherwise. I'll pass on that.
4. Being in control of my feelings is important to me
I am pleased that my emotions do not dominate my actions. I refuse to let my feelings for a guy overwhelm me, especially if he does not feel the same way. I believe that there is a guy out there who will appreciate and reciprocate all the love and affection I have to offer. If we are not compatible, then I choose to move on.
5. I deserve better from myself
I have been hurt by several guys, and upon reflection, I acknowledged that I was partly responsible for the pain. I disregarded warning signs, gave without reciprocity, and lowered my expectations for guys who couldn't meet them. I have learned from these experiences and refuse to continue making those mistakes because I hold myself in high esteem. I deserve better treatment, and I will demand it.
6. If he Is worth it, he Will prove it
To discern which guys are genuinely deserving of my attention, I rely on their willingness to demonstrate their worthiness. If a guy genuinely desires to establish a relationship with me, he will spare no effort in demonstrating his commitment. I am not interested in guys who are indolent or lack the enthusiasm to make an effort.
7. I Am not into almost relationships
When a guy I am dating expresses a desire to keep things casual despite enjoying our time together, I can discern his character immediately. He wants the benefits of a girlfriend without any obligation, and that is unacceptable to me. My time is valuable, and I have no intention of wasting it on a guy who views me as a fallback option when he is bored.
8. I won't set myself up to be disappointed
If I find myself developing feelings for a guy who isn't reciprocating, that's a clear indication that the relationship is not worth pursuing. I am aware of the indicators and understand what I seek from a relationship, therefore I refuse to accept anything less for fear of being disappointed in love once more.
9. Just because I Am down-to-earth does Not mean I don't want to be taken seriously
While I enjoy humor and have a low-maintenance attitude, I refuse to tolerate disrespectful treatment. Relationships are one aspect of life that should never be taken lightly, and I regard them with great importance.
10. It Is easier to weed out the wrong guys this way
By observing a guy's reactions as our relationship develops, I can rapidly determine if he's worth my time and effort. I will maintain authority over my emotions and can easily dismiss him if he isn't the right guy for me.