Each woman has a special person who becomes "That Boyfriend" - the standard against whom all others are measured, and whom you miss even when you make an effort not to. In my case, that person was my first love, but after a period of time, I can confidently say that he is no longer occupying my thoughts or heart. Here is how I was able to move on:
1. I Forgot About Dating
Although I developed an interest in a few guys, I didn't bother much when nothing came out of it. I preferred to be single and get over my ex. Sometimes, it can be beneficial to focus on things other than love and dating. Once I was sure that I had moved on from my past relationship, I was completely comfortable with diving back into the dating world.
2. I Cut Him Out Of My Life
Personally, I am not inclined to maintain a friendship with my ex-boyfriends, especially with someone who caused me more pain than anything else towards the end of our relationship. Despite my reservations, my ex-boyfriend has tried to reconnect with me on social media and through messages. Initially, I responded to his messages and made it crystal clear that I had no interest in engaging in conversations. However, later on, I chose to ignore him completely, which made things a lot easier for me.
3. I Learned Some Hard Truths
It was a painful realization that loving someone doesn't guarantee a successful relationship. Even more so, it was disheartening to realize that the only person I ever loved had to follow a different path that didn't include me. Once I accepted this truth, it became easier for me to take a deep breath and let go, moving on with my life.
4. I Stopped Blaming Him
In some cases, the downfall of a romantic relationship is a result of both parties' actions, while in other cases, it may not be anyone's fault. After I let go of the notion that my ex-partner had done something wrong, it became simple for me to forgive and move on. After all, what other option did I have? Was I going to spend the rest of my life being angry at him?
5. I Got My Act Together
Following a few months of self-pity, I took charge of my life and started putting the pieces back together. Gradually, I managed to divert my attention away from my ex-partner and onto other aspects of my life. I matured and evolved as a person, and in retrospect, I even came to appreciate the negative experience of our breakup since it had helped me become a better version of myself.
6. I Followed My Dreams
It's remarkable how embarking on a career path can divert one's attention from heartbreak, and ultimately provide a fulfilling experience that is comparable to falling in love. In my opinion, anyone going through a heartbreak should channel their energy into working diligently towards their goals.
7. I Remembered The Good Stuff
It's not uncommon to experience a feeling of devastation after a breakup, where it appears that everything positive has been destroyed. Nevertheless, I decided to focus on the good things: the reasons that initially made me fall in love with my partner and the emotions that I desired to retain even after the breakup.
8. I Let Go Of The Bad
On the flip side, I had to remind myself of the terrible times in our relationship; otherwise, I would never have been able to let go completely. Every relationship experiences highs and lows, and it's necessary to acknowledge the negative aspects before eventually letting them go. Sometimes, it's beneficial to dwell on the unpleasant memories for a while before ultimately releasing them.
9. I Kept Believing In Love
It's effortless to succumb to the belief that the end of one love story signifies the impossibility of a new one. However, I refused to allow myself to feel that way. Instead, I overcame my heartbreak by retaining my faith in love, regardless of the circumstances. I had experienced love once, and I was convinced that I could experience it again in the future.
10. I Stayed Focused
There were instances where I would break down in bathrooms and ponder whether I could ever love another person as much as I loved my ex-partner. It's a common experience, isn't it? However, I persevered and remained resilient, which is the most valuable advice I can offer to anyone going through a breakup. It was immaterial how often my ex tried to contact me or what he wanted; my main priority was to move on from him. And eventually, that's precisely what I achieved.