I Looked Through My Boyfriend's Phone Because I Thought He Was Cheating—He Was Not And He Dumped Me

Initially, I had suspicions that my boyfriend was keeping something from me, as he had been acting somewhat aloof and preoccupied lately. Consequently, I took it upon myself to investigate by going through his phone. Although I had expected to come across concrete proof of his infidelity, I stumbled upon more than I had anticipated.

1. I found nada. Nothing. Zippo

Despite combing through my boyfriend's phone meticulously, scouring his emails, photo gallery, and Facebook account, I couldn't find anything that raised any red flags. While I should have been relieved by this discovery, I found myself feeling uneasy and perplexed. What could be causing my boyfriend's strange behavior?

2. I'd been wrong about two things

There were two things I realized after snooping through my boyfriend's phone. Firstly, I had been anticipating to discover evidence of him being unfaithful. Secondly, I had believed that it was acceptable to snoop, as it seemed to be a common practice among many people. A study conducted in 2014 revealed that one in five men and one in four women check their partner's phones without their knowledge. However, despite the prevalence of this behavior, I was plagued with guilt for violating my boyfriend's privacy, rather than feeling relieved that he was not cheating on me.

3. I was bitten by the snooping bug

Although I initially felt remorseful for snooping through my boyfriend's phone, I began to doubt my findings and wondered if he had deleted any incriminating evidence. This suspicion prompted me to go through his phone once more, several weeks after our initial disagreement. After discovering nothing once again, I became fixated on checking his phone regularly to alleviate my concerns about him cheating.

4. I didn't trust him

The root of the problem was that I had a clear lack of trust in my boyfriend. Otherwise, why would I have felt compelled to constantly scrutinize his phone? It was almost as if I was subconsciously searching for something to prove my suspicions, but despite my efforts, I never found anything incriminating. As a result, I was plagued with feelings of guilt and self-doubt every time I went through his phone.

5. I came clean about what I was doing

After snooping through my boyfriend's phone on multiple occasions and grappling with mounting guilt, I eventually decided to come clean and confess to him about my actions. Regrettably, my boyfriend was incensed by my betrayal and terminated our relationship.

6. I couldn't blame him

I had committed a series of grave offenses against my boyfriend, including lying to him, intruding into his private phone, and breaching his privacy. Most egregious of all, I had unjustly suspected him of infidelity when he had done nothing wrong. I had been consumed with distrust towards him, but now I realized that he had every reason to question my own trustworthiness. It was a frustrating realization.

7. He said I had issues and he wasn't wrong

When I confessed to my boyfriend about snooping through his phone, he accused me of being jealous and insecure, which I initially accepted as true. After all, my actions did reflect my lack of trust in him. However, I gradually realized that my motivations were more complicated than just mere jealousy and insecurity.

8. Snooping was a symptom, not a disease

Despite having no concrete evidence, I found it difficult to trust my boyfriend. The compulsion to snoop was indicative of a deeper issue. Perhaps we were not compatible, and my instincts were trying to signal that. Regardless, it was apparent that something was amiss in our relationship, and my intuition was trying to tell me something important.

9. Snooping is stooping to a crappy level

Having learned from my mistakes, I have resolved never to snoop through my partner's phone again. I now recognize the harmful and foolish nature of snooping in relationships, as it only serves to undermine trust and create feelings of guilt and shame. I refuse to be the kind of person who resorts to deceitful tactics, regardless of the circumstances.

10. I was searching for a reason

In retrospect, I realize that my motives for snooping went beyond simply trying to uncover evidence of my partner's infidelity. I was also subconsciously searching for a way to end the relationship. I had not been particularly content with our relationship due to the lack of trust, and it felt as though I was desperately searching for a justification to leave.

11. I should've just left with class

I regret snooping instead of just leaving the guy. If I had done that, at least I would have maintained my dignity. By snooping, I acted as the antagonist and became the thing I despised the most, a liar.

12. When he dumped me, it was a relief

Initially, I was consumed with guilt and remorse for the damage caused to our relationship due to my bad behavior. However, after some time had passed following our breakup, I experienced a sense of relief for having ended things. I knew that leaving was the correct choice, and I believed my ex-partner shared the same sentiment.

13. i don't need stress in my life

Snooping had caused me immense stress and guilt, but being in that relationship was equally taxing. The constant fear of being hurt made me feel like I was walking on eggshells all the time. I was always on guard, waiting for the other shoe to drop and anticipating his infidelity. Subjecting myself to such stress was not fair to me.

14. I needed to trust myself

I didn't trust my ex and shouldn't have felt compelled to take drastic measures to prove it. Instead, I should have trusted my own intuition and walked away from the relationship to seek happiness, rather than leaving behind a trail of animosity. It's somewhat comforting to know that my ex is happy and in love with someone else now.