My belief in the abundance of good men was challenged as I aged and faced negative experiences. Furthermore, seeing my friends also being mistreated reinforced my doubts about the existence of truly good men.
1. I don't trust them
Despite my desire to trust men, my past experiences make it difficult for me to do so. I find myself feeling vulnerable and easily hurt whenever I open up and trust someone. As a result, I've become suspicious and anxious, and I am reluctant to put myself in a position to be hurt again. I wish to be more trusting but my past experiences have made it difficult for me to let my guard down.
2. I don't think they're capable of emotional maturity
I find that even the men I consider to be the best lack emotional and mental maturity. I wonder if there are any men out there who are not just emotionally immature. It concerns me as I do not see this trait in women to the same degree. I am seeking a man who is on my level of maturity and thus far, it has been difficult to find one who matches that.
3. I think they'll do whatever they can get away with
I realize that my viewpoint may come across as cynical, but it is my honest belief. In my opinion, if given the opportunity without the risk of getting caught, any man would cheat. I do not believe that there is a man who would not succumb to temptation. It is disheartening for me to acknowledge these feelings, but I believe it to be true.
4. I've seen too much shady behavior to trust anyone
Given my experiences of observing many men lie firsthand, it is difficult for me to trust them. There are many individuals who pretend to be something they are not. They give the impression that their partners are everything to them, while they are unfaithful behind their backs. Their partners are unaware of their infidelity, and it makes me feel sympathy for them and fear of experiencing the same. I have witnessed too much deceit to believe that men are inherently good.
5. I get burned every time I give them the benefit of the doubt
It seems as though they knowingly and intentionally cause harm. I cannot understand this behavior. I remain cautious and keep my guard up, but once I open up and trust someone, they discard my feelings as if they are insignificant.
6. I find out that every guy who seems great… isn't
While I understand that everyone has their own flaws, I believe that everyone should make an effort to be a good person. I strive to be a good person myself. Unfortunately, I have encountered numerous men who initially appeared to be decent, but ultimately revealed themselves to be terrible individuals. I have also witnessed my friends experience terrible situations with men who they thought were "good guys." As a result, I no longer believe in the concept of "good men."
7. I don't think I'm asking for all that much
All I am looking for is a man who is honest and faithful to me, who doesn't cheat or lie. I believe this to be the basic requirement in a relationship, yet it seems difficult to find. Even when they appear to be genuine, they end up hiding things or lying to avoid any conflicts. This is not a healthy way to maintain a relationship and it is disheartening.
8. I can't make myself believe a guy is great even when he does nothing to make me feel otherwise
I have reached a point where I am constantly expecting the worst outcome in any relationship. Trust is essential in any healthy relationship, but I find it hard to trust any man. This is why I have chosen not to date currently, but I am uncertain of when or if my perspective will change, and it is a frustrating feeling.
9. I expect the worst of every man at this point
It is disheartening to have these thoughts and feelings. I hope to find a wonderful partner who desires to be with me and whom I can trust. However, the abundance of negative experiences and evidence to the contrary make it difficult to maintain that faith. Unfortunately, I often encounter men who act in a disrespectful manner on a daily basis.
10. I'm eternally getting disappointed by guys
I must have a poor ability to select partners, as they never meet my expectations. I have modest expectations, I simply desire a respectable person who treats me with respect and consideration. However, I consistently end up with self-centered individuals who make promises but do not follow through on them. I am unsure of why this pattern continues to occur, and it leads me to question if all men are inherently flawed.
11. I've literally given up on dating because I don't trust anyone
I find it difficult to understand the purpose of dating if I cannot commit fully to a partner. It would take a significant amount of effort for any man to earn my trust, as my past experiences have made it difficult for me to open up to others. This is a disheartening reality.
12. I think even if I find a great man, I won't believe it's possible
My experiences have made me so skeptical that I fear I cannot trust my own judgment when it comes to recognizing a good man. I worry that my emotions will cloud my judgment and I will end up being hurt again. I am tired of the manipulation, dishonesty and chaos in relationships, and I desire something simple, good and joyful in a partner. However, the fear of never finding that kind of relationship is overwhelming.