Initially, you expressed interest in me for quite some time, but I didn't feel the same way. While I valued our friendship, I didn't see you as a potential romantic partner. However, my perspective shifted once the possibility of being with you was no longer an option.
1. Sometimes you really don't know what you've got 'til it's gone
It wasn't until I saw you with someone else that I realized what a wonderful person you are. When you were unattached, I didn't fully appreciate you and took your presence for granted. It was only after I realized you were never really mine that I began to miss you.
2. I was being selfish
It was within your rights to move forward and pursue a romantic life, but I didn't prioritize what was fair or just. Instead, my selfish desires took precedence over what was best for you. I was only concerned with the fact that I was no longer receiving attention and affection. Looking back, I see that my "feelings" were merely a manifestation of wanting what I couldn't have.
3. I was more interested in the chase
You pursued me initially, and that made it too effortless for me to obtain your affection. Meanwhile, I craved the thrill of pursuing someone unattainable more than being in a relationship. Ultimately, I desired the chase more than I desired you, and looking back, I recognize how foolish that was.
4. I missed the feeling of you wanting me
It felt good to be desired. I believe that everyone likes to feel desired, deep down. I wasn't particularly affected by your interest in me until you shifted your attention to someone else. I didn't necessarily want to be with you, I just wanted to be wanted by you. Looking back, I realize how self-centered that was.
5. I was jealous
You were a constant and essential friend in my life, but suddenly, you became less available because you were spending more time with her. I longed for the time we used to spend together. I viewed her as a child who took my toy on the playground and didn't understand how to share. However, you were not a toy; you were a truly exceptional person, and while I may not have appreciated that, she certainly did.
6. I saw what a wonderful boyfriend you could be
After you became her partner, I had a firsthand look at how you embody everything that a great boyfriend should be. I observed you treat her with kindness and consideration, while I remained single. I didn't truly want you for myself. Instead, I yearned for the kind of relationship that you shared with her, and that's still the case.
7. I didn't realize I had feelings for you
It wasn't until I witnessed you with someone else that I realized my own feelings. I believed that we were purely platonic friends, and I wasn't intentionally concealing any romantic emotions. In fact, I didn't even recognize that those feelings existed. It was only after seeing you with her that I comprehended my affection, but by then it was too late.
8. Our timing was always off
When you were interested in me, I didn't take it seriously, and I failed to recognize your worth. My intentions were strictly limited to friendship. Unfortunately, by the time I developed feelings for you, you had already moved on, and I realized that I had missed my opportunity. I have no one to blame but myself.
9. I started to miss something we never had
As I watched the two of you together, I found myself imagining that I was her. I daydreamed about us falling in love and building a future together. After allowing myself to picture that future, it was challenging to let go of that dream. I missed and grieved for a relationship that never existed because I longed for a love like that for myself.
10. In the end, I just want you to be happy
If she's the one you choose, then she's fortunate to have you. You're an amazing person, and I understand that now. You deserve to be with a woman who recognizes your worth from the start. I had the opportunity, but I messed it up, and I'm done sulking about it. You deserve to be with someone who brings you joy, even if that person isn't me.