Published in Jun 2018 / Updated in Aug 2021
We’ve all been there. Tried something that didn’t work, or something seemed to be going so well, but then things went wrong, and we had to face the dreaded word: Failure.
As humans, we are not wired for failure. We have this inbuilt desire to succeed in everything we do. Well, it doesn’t have to end there. You can use your failures to create a platform for your success.
Here are three steps on how to turn that past failure into success:
Admit it – you failed
First, it is extremely important to acknowledge failure because this is the first step towards success. Denying your failures only keeps you rooted to one spot or going around in circles. Therefore, you need to learn to admit that you have failed when you have. Suppose you are stuck in a marriage that isn’t working. There is constant cheating or domestic abuse. You need to admit that things are not working. This is a step towards the next step.
I know this guy who kept on pumping capital into a business that wasn’t working. A bigger business had already taken up most of his potential clientele. By the time he closed shop, he had spent over $200,000 and owed over $50,000. If only he had acknowledged failure, he could have spared a lot of money for a better business idea.
Consider the lessons learned
Every failure is a lesson learned, and failing your ultimate goal doesn’t mean that you totally failed. There are often good things to be salvaged from failure, even when the ultimate goal is not reached. For instance, you may have failed in that relationship, but is there a good thing that came out of it?
My cousin loves her son with all her heart, and you can always see what joy he gives her. And yet, she got him through a relationship that she considers one of the biggest failures in her life, one that ended bitterly. She was able to make much better choices in her next relationship because she knew the warning signs to avoid from her previous one.
You should be able to gauge your progress and your growth by comparing the past with the present. Past choices mixed with present choices. You should never be stuck in the same cycle. If there are traits you did not like in your ex, you would be unwise to date a man with the same traits. Always ask yourself: am I upgrading or am I stuck in the same cycle?
Having learned these lessons, it is time to try again. Trying again means facing the fear of past failures and going ahead anyway because now you know better. Now you will look out for warning signs when you date again, and you will be careful when making that investment. You will seek advice where necessary, unlike when you trusted only in your own judgment. It is worth it to try again because the joy of success far outweighs the sorrow of failure.
Remember, failure shapes success by teaching you the loopholes. So if you have been cowering behind the shadows of past failures, it is time to stand tall. Consider the lessons learned, and try again because thanks to failure, you are now wiser.