How to Stop Putting Pressure on Yourself and Be Content with Who You Already Are
Milica JaricPublished in September 2020 / Updated in December 2020
You’re doing your best, but it doesn’t feel like it’s enough. You’re putting too much pressure, which can mess up your mental health and sense of self.
The real question isn’t how to be better. It’s how to be grateful, content with all that you are. So, how can you get to that point?
You need to step away from questions like: “How do I stop being so hard on yourself? How do I stop putting pressure on myself?” And of course, you need to know, “Why I am always so hard on myself?”
The pressure equals wasting time
Think about it. Your desire to move forward got you stuck in a place of dread. The unrealistic expectations are turning you into a bitter, stressed-out person.
You know that most famous stories about success come down to “work hard play harder,” Let me tell you the truth: it’s pure BS. If you’re always working, you don’t have enough time to play. And if you can’t even play, when will you have your time to unwind?
Accept mistakes and failure
We live in a world where we feel pressure all the time. It starts when you’re a toddler and doesn’t have to end. Well, you can and will end it now, because all those negative emotions are a waste of everything you already have, you achieved, all that you are.
So, learning to accept mistakes and failure goes hand in hand with learning gratitude.
And you can’t be thankful for all you have when you’re feeling stressed—all the time.
Let’s break it down to make it easier to comprehend.
Stop overanalyzing what you should do. Should is no longer an option.
Write down all the things you achieved in the past few years.
Now, start a gratitude journal. You have to write down at least three things you’re thankful for. Every single day!
Learn to de-stress, with yoga, breathing exercises, (deep breathing helps), or whatever makes you happy. Dancing, singing, knitting, the list goes on.
The next stop in reprogramming you is to make you believe that you can and will have the life you deserve.
Happiness is within you, not around the corner
Believing in yourself is a skill. When you’re mindful, and you know that peer pressure is useless, good things will come to you.
Of course, no one says that you’ll become a millionaire by playing video games all day. Nor will you meet the person of your dreams when you never put yourself out there.
But, if you know that your best is enough, that is the essence of believing in yourself. And that’s where happiness starts.
And here’s the deal: being happy is about being content and in sync with your emotions, thoughts, beliefs. It’s about finding inner peace, so it’s all connected. As it should be.
The next step is figuring out what it is that you truly want from your life. That’s a big one, but don’t think, move forward, because everything else is meaningless.
Relieve stress now!
The world’s full of cool stuff, waiting for you to see them, sense them, and enjoy them. Yet, here you are, putting so much pressure that you’re about to burst.
Here’s what you can do now to stop torturing yourself!
Start your deep breathing by inhaling through your nose, as if you want to fill out your belly. Let the exhale be at least a few seconds longer and through the mouth.
Put on some music that brings you joy. It doesn’t have to be anything calming, but something you actually like. For me, it’s Them Bones, which simply takes away the stress and anger. How? Who cares, it’s your choice, trust it.
Stop thinking and start smelling or noticing things around you. Name them. Name the scents or the sounds around you. Be present, mindful.
Get some fresh air and stretch out. Even when you’re in the office, you can take a five-minute break and focus on the outside world. No planning, just breathing.
Grab your gratitude journal and remember all that you achieved. This is a great way to step away from unrealistic expectations and remember to continue believing in yourself.
Finally, just do it. Procrastination puts too much pressure on your overstressed mind, so start with small steps, and you’ll be closer to your goal.
No one knows what they’re doing either
Stop beating yourself up and being hard on yourself. The main point of this journey we call life is to be fulfilled. And that’s individual, personal, and not related to material stuff or other people.
Your only competition is you. And your biggest enemy is staring at you in the mirror. To truly move forward, you need to be your own best friend.
All those popular success stories, they belong to other people. Create your own by becoming your biggest fan. No more peer pressure, because as you practice how to be content, you will stop silly comparisons. My life, my rules – your new motto!
We’re all lost in this big imperfect world, and we’re continually trying to find ways to relieve stress. There’s too much going on, and we’re wasting time instead of focusing on what we can change: and that’s our way of thinking.
Now, please do not feel pressure to master the art of being mindful, calmer, better you, in a matter of hours. It takes time, but you got this far for nothing.