How To Stop Going Back To Your Ex And Move On For Good

Although you may have fantasized about finding love your entire life, your daydreams will never match the reality of it. Your ideal partner may not fit the image you envisioned, but ultimately, you wouldn't exchange your love story for anyone else's. Attempting to envision the perfect relationship is limited by the imagination's bounds. However, genuine love transcends all expectations and will surpass anything you could have imagined, making it an experience beyond comparison.

1. Cut Him Off In Every Possible Way

This doesn't have to be a permanent decision, but it may appear unfeasible. You both have been integral to each other's lives for a long time, and the notion of cutting off contact may seem daunting. Unfortunately, it's essential if you want to have any chance of moving forward. You can spare yourself a lot of agony by following this one piece of advice: after the breakup, avoid texting him or responding to his messages. Refrain from making plans to meet up and unfollow each other on social media. Eliminate all the temptations that may lead to contact.

2. Cry, Cry, And Cry Some More

In my opinion, it's not healthy to suppress your emotions. If you feel like crying due to your breakup or the absence of your ex, don't hold back. Sob, wail, or shriek, do whatever helps you cope. However, once you've finished crying, acknowledge your emotions. It's understandable to be upset, but keep in mind that the intensity of your emotions won't last forever. By allowing yourself to grieve, you're giving yourself the chance to process your feelings, but don't let your sorrow take over.

3. Get Out With Your Girls And Make Guy Talk Off-Limits

After ending an on-again, off-again relationship, you'll notice that your schedule has significantly cleared up. You may realize that you're not as busy as you previously believed. The key is to spend your newfound free time wisely. Avoid wallowing in sadness or reminiscing about your past relationship on social media. Instead, spend time with your friends. Chances are, they missed you, particularly if your relationship was consuming most of your time. However, make sure to avoid discussing guys; it's better for your emotional well-being.

4. Ask For A Realistic Opinion

Spending more time with your friends gives you ample opportunities to get their honest opinions about your ex. Perhaps they were reluctant to share their true feelings earlier because they didn't want to upset you. However, now that your relationship is over, they might be more forthcoming. Although you may still feel vulnerable and harbor emotions for your ex, try to listen to your friends' perspectives. Don't become defensive, and refrain from making excuses for him.

5. Think About What You Really Want

Being in a long-term relationship can make you forget your own desires and preferences. Over time, it's easy to merge with your partner and lose sight of your individuality. After a breakup, it's common to feel lost and uncertain about your identity. It's important to take some time to reflect on who you are now and what you want out of life. You may find that your ex doesn't fit into your future plans anymore, and that's okay. This is your opportunity to rediscover yourself and prioritize your own goals and aspirations.

6. Don't Date But do Consider The Possibility Of Dating

Rebounding may not be as exciting as it appears. You may end up comparing your new partner to your ex, and pretending that you have moved on when you haven't. Instead, keep an open mind towards the idea of dating in the future. Don't convince yourself that you'll never find someone who compares to your ex because it's not true and not helpful. Even if you don't have anyone in mind right now, think about the qualities you'd like to have in a future partner.

7. Stop Stalking Him

Assuming you're not literally stalking your ex, do you still follow them on social media? Perhaps you watch their Instagram stories a few (hundred) times a day because you haven't texted or called them, but you can't bring yourself to remove them from your online life. It's time to stop. If you've already cut off contact but you're still checking up on them on Facebook, you're hindering your progress in truly moving on. There's no need to see who they're with or what they're up to. Unfollow, unfriend, and move on.

8. Quit The Negative Self-Talk

Letting go of self-blame can be one of the toughest challenges after a breakup. You might find yourself thinking about what you could have done differently or feeling completely responsible for the relationship's failure. Fortunately, there are many resources available to help combat negative thinking. You could download one of the many apps that send you positive affirmations daily and try to stop thinking that the breakup makes you a failure.

9. Don't Underestimate The Power Of Time

It is often said that time is the ultimate healer. While it may not hold true for every situation, it certainly does when it comes to breakups. Give yourself the gift of time as it can be your best ally in helping you move on and adapt to the idea of being single or finding someone new. Embrace the idea of moving on permanently from your ex and leave the past behind.