How-To

How To Play A Player At His Own Game And Come Out On Top

Is it frustrating when a guy won't commit or thinks he's the best? Absolutely. But why do the blandest men often cause the most problems? They usually aren't worth the hassle, so why not give them a taste of their own medicine? Here are some tips for playing the player and getting revenge.

1. Go Out Without Him

It's important to be confident and embrace your own attractiveness. Take those bold, provocative pictures and wear something that makes you feel amazing. Let your ex see what they're missing out on and don't be afraid to let them know that you're not waiting around for them. Remember, you have a lot to offer and you shouldn't feel guilty or ashamed for attracting the attention of others. Show the world, including your ex, that you're thriving and they may be left wondering where things went wrong. As my sister always says, there are plenty of interested guys out there and you could easily fill a team - and then some - with them.

2. Play Hard To Get

Don't be constantly available and willing to change your plans to accommodate him. Demonstrate that you value your time and are in control of your own schedule. Until he shows that he is a reliable and committed partner, don't give him much of your attention. It's important for him to put in the effort and work to be with you. If he doesn't, it's better for both of you to maintain your independence.

3. Leave Him On Read

It may be controversial, but here's my opinion: if he only responds to you occasionally, don't reply immediately. Don't give him the satisfaction. If you're only communicating infrequently, there's no real connection. If you want to keep things casual, that's fine, but if you want to maintain some power in the relationship, it's important to keep things unpredictable. Blow him off and keep him on his toes. Don't be too predictable.

4. Make The First Move

If you're interested in the person and things are going well, but you want to shake things up a bit, don't be afraid to make the first move. Players may expect to be in control, but you can set the terms of the relationship for yourself. Don't let him give you the "I'll text you later" line. Your time is valuable and you shouldn't have to wait around for him. Take charge and ask him out. Be bold and confident.

5. See Other People

Remember, both of you have agreed that this is a casual relationship. Unless you have had a specific conversation about exclusivity, it's okay to see other people. Don't limit yourself. He won't either. Keep your options open and have fun. The "talking" phase of a relationship can be boring, so make sure you find ways to have a good time.

6. Experiment

Use the player as an opportunity to experiment and try new things. Don't be shy about it. He's probably doing the same thing. Use this opportunity to test out different relationship boundaries, try new positions in bed, and communicate in different ways. Figure out what works for you. This is a good way to learn more about yourself and what you want in a relationship without committing to the wrong person.

7. Keep It Casual

Neither of you is looking for marriage, so don't try to force yourselves into a serious relationship that neither of you wants. He may be used to women who want to jump into something more serious, but don't follow that trend. Do something unexpected. There are many different ways to be with someone, and it's okay to try them out. You don't owe him all your time or your secrets. Keep things light and casual by just dipping your toes in.

8. Know Your Boundaries

It's important to know what you want and not let anyone pressure you into doing something you're not comfortable with. Playing the player may seem appealing in theory, but make sure it's something you actually enjoy and feel good about. If you decide to try it, remember that you can stop whenever you want or embrace this new aspect of your personality. If you do it on your own terms, being a "player" can be empowering and change your perspective on relationships. However, it's not for everyone. Remember the saying, "Don't hate the player, hate the game."

9. Don't Commit

It's important to take things slowly and not get too caught up in any one person. Consider dating multiple people and keeping in touch with your friends and family. Make sure to communicate your needs to everyone you're seeing, and use this flexibility as an opportunity to try new things and take risks.

Next time you feel like a player has wasted your time and treated you badly, remember these tips for regaining your power.