When getting familiar with someone new, it's common to feel nervous about not coming across as dull or driving them away. Every message can trigger uncertainty, leaving you wondering if you're revealing too much or too little. If you're searching for tips on how to make your texts interesting to a guy, we have the solution.
HOW TO NOT BE A BORING TEXTER
It's crucial to be authentic, but it's also necessary to control certain behaviors, especially during the initial stage of communication with someone. Take into account some of the suggestions listed below to establish a productive texting relationship with your new romantic interest.
1. Never Respond with One-Word Answers (or Single Emojis)
This is a definite method to bring the conversation to a halt. Responding with just one word or a simple symbol creates the impression that you're not bothered to engage in a proper conversation. If you don't show any effort in maintaining the exchange, why should he persist in it?
2. Avoid Asking Standard, Uninteresting Questions
How often do you feel annoyed when someone texts you to inquire about your well-being or work? Exactly. Instead, ask him about a memorable event from his day or his favorite childhood sandwich. Pose unusual questions that will spark his interest and prompt him to reply with more than just a simple "okay."
3. Be Engaging, but Don't Overshare
If you had a hectic and stressful day, avoid bombarding him with 17 messages recounting everything that went wrong. Instead, share a quirky moment from your day, but keep it brief. For example, mention how someone at your workplace wore their underwear on their head. Don't overwhelm him with too many details, just share something short that you couldn't make up if you tried.
4. Don't Offer Vague Answers
When he inquires about your interests or hobbies, be clear and concise in your response. For example, if he asks if you like to exercise, don't simply reply with "yes, sometimes." Instead, let him know that you enjoy running, yoga, and playing ultimate frisbee. If he asks about your reading habits, inform him of the types of books you prefer, or ask if he's read a specific title.
5. Build Upon the Questions He Asks You
To build on the previous suggestion, when your date inquires about you, reciprocate the gesture by asking similar questions about them. Don't simply reply with a generic "how about you?" Instead, try to tailor your questions based on their interests. For instance, if you shared your passion for sports, you could ask if they've ever tried white water rafting. Or, if they seem to have a literary side, you could inquire about a specific book they've read or suggest starting a two-person book club by reading a novel together.
6. Ask Him Things More than Talking About Yourself
Avoid sending lengthy and verbose texts. Instead, keep your responses concise when sharing information about yourself. Shift the focus to getting to know your date by asking for their thoughts, opinions, or advice on a project or situation. You can also request book or film recommendations from them. The key is to engage in conversation by approaching it in an indirect manner, rather than a straightforward interrogative style.
7. Take Your Time Answering
By taking your time and offering thought-provoking and intriguing answers, you demonstrate that you're actively considering your responses. This shows that you're not just reflexively grabbing your phone every time you receive a notification. Your well-considered answers will indicate to your date that your responses to them are important to you, rather than being merely impulsive filler.
8. Toss in Some Flirtiness
While being intellectual and serious is impressive, flirting through texts can be just as enjoyable. You don't have to jump straight to sending provocative photos (at least not right away!), but a playful and flirtatious comment every now and then can be well received. To emphasize your playful tone, consider adding a heart or wink emoji to your message. This is a fun and lighthearted way to express your interest.
9. Don't Keep Him Hanging
Along the same lines, try not to keep your date waiting for a response for an extended period of time. If you realize it's getting late and you may fall asleep before being able to text back, let them know. If your phone battery is running low, inform them so they know that any delay in response is not due to a lack of interest or concern. And if you do unexpectedly fall asleep or step away, be sure to follow up and let them know what happened. This demonstrates kindness and thoughtfulness.
10. Share Fun or Silly Gifs/Memes
Text conversations can sometimes become monotonous. To add some excitement, try incorporating amusing memes into your messages every once in a while. They are an eye-catching way to capture your date's attention and prompt them to reply with similar content. You could even engage in a playful competition by exchanging terrible puns, making bad movie references, or anything that's lighthearted and fun.
WHAT DO I DO IF A GUY IS A BORING TEXTER?
It can be discouraging when you put effort into making your text conversations interesting, only to receive lackluster, brief responses in return.
Consider the Circumstances
If your text conversations with him seem dull, especially in the late evening, it could be that he's simply tired. If he's had a long day at work or school, he might be exhausted by 9 pm and unable to engage in lively conversation. While he may still be glad to hear from you, he may not have the mental or physical energy to respond in a meaningful way.
It's also important to keep in mind that you may not be aware of everything happening in his personal life. His seemingly dull or disinterested responses might be due to circumstances beyond his control. Perhaps he has a family member who is ill or has passed away. Or he could be facing a challenging or distressing situation at work. It's possible that he's doing the best he can in the moment.
Take a moment to consider the potential reasons behind this "boring" behavior. And don't hesitate to check in with him and ask if everything is alright. Your concern and care could encourage him to share more with you and strengthen your connection.
If You Know Him Well in Person, Compare Personality Differences
It's important to remember that the way people communicate through text may not reflect their communication style in person. Some people enjoy taking breaks from screen time, while others prefer more personal forms of communication, such as voice or video calls or face-to-face conversations.
If you have a good understanding of the guy you're texting in person, consider the difference between his behavior face-to-face and through text. If he's friendly and engaging with you in person, it's possible that he simply values alone time when he's at home. This could explain why he keeps his texts brief or doesn't answer the phone when he's occupied with a favorite show or game.
This is not a reflection on you, but rather a reflection of his personal preferences.
HOW TO RESPOND TO A DRY TEXT FROM A GUY
There are many ways to encourage someone to engage with you more without causing frustration. It's important to respect any boundaries they may have set.
Try to Engage Him with Humor
Try injecting some humor into your reply to lighten the mood and add some spark to the conversation. Just make sure your jokes are actually funny and in line with the tone of your interaction.
If he tells you he had a quick and simple dinner, add some humor to the conversation by sharing a hilarious story about your own cooking mishap. For example, "I know what you mean, the last time I tried to 'throw something together', I ended up with a bowl of ramen noodle mushroom soup topped with crushed Fritos. Not my finest culinary moment."
Or share a similarly embarrassing or funny experience. This will likely elicit a response from him and lead to a more engaging conversation.
Ask Him Something Thought Provoking
Try flirting or asking deep questions instead of repetitive "how was your day" ones to keep the conversation interesting. A guy who seems uninterested may perk up if you suggest exchanging playful photos or pose thought-provoking questions. If he's giving short replies, try humor or flirty conversation starters once or twice. If he still doesn't engage, let him come to you.
If he's giving short replies, try humor or flirty conversation starters once or twice. If he still doesn't engage, let him come to you.
Avoid becoming overly concerned with the perception of being dull while texting a guy. Your anxiety to appear interesting may be conveyed through your messages and have the opposite effect.
Calm down, don't worry, and implement the suggestions given above.
Just be yourself in your texts, strike a balance between keeping things short and sweet while also being lively and expressive. Ask more questions and allow him the freedom to respond in his own way.
Remember to enjoy the process of getting to know someone new and have fun with it! That's what makes the experience of texting a guy an exciting adventure.