How To Know If You Like A Guy For Real Or Just Like The Attention

Dating can be tough, especially in the digital age. So when you find someone who seems like a decent option, it can be tempting to hold on to them even if the relationship doesn't feel like it's going anywhere. But is it worth sticking around just for the attention? Here are some signs that your feelings for a guy might be real and could potentially turn into something more.

1. Do You Have That Much In Common?

It's important to have your own interests and hobbies, but if you and your partner are on completely different planes of existence and never intersect, it may be difficult to truly connect with them. In order to genuinely like someone, you should be able to relate to them and their life in some way.

2. Are You Actually Excited When He Texts?

You're comfortable enough with your partner that you no longer feel the need to seek the advice of friends before responding to their texts. However, you may still find yourself hesitating before sending a reply. Consider whether this hesitation is due to a habit of playing games or if it's because you simply don't feel like talking to your partner at the moment. It's important to be honest with yourself and your feelings to determine the state of your relationship.

3. Is It Turning Into A Hookup?

Even in promising relationships, it's possible for things to become more casual and focused on physical intimacy. If you were once going on dates, but now only seeing each other on weekends and mostly meeting up late at night, it may be a sign that one of you is not fully invested in the relationship. If you're not doing typical couple activities like having dinner together, it may be time to consider whether you both want the same level of commitment.

4. Can You See Yourself Eventually Being In A Real Relationship?

It's natural to have certain expectations and desires for your future and the person you want to share it with. If you find yourself imagining a future with some partners but not others, it could be a sign that you don't see a long-term future with the latter. If you've never even considered what a life with a particular guy would be like, it's worth taking a step back to consider why that might be.

5. Do You Feel Like You're Not Actually Getting To Know Him?

If you find yourself constantly communicating with someone but feel like the relationship is not moving forward, it may be time to decide whether you want to continue getting to know them. It's difficult to decide whether you want to pursue a romantic relationship with someone if you don't have enough information about them. Consider whether you want to take the next steps in getting to know this person and potentially starting a relationship with them.

6. Are You Just Seeing Him Because You Don't Want To Date Someone Else?

First dates can be nerve-wracking experiences. You may spend a lot of time deciding on the perfect outfit and wondering if you'll have anything in common with your date. The outcome of a first date can range from a great connection to a complete disappointment. If you're questioning whether you're dating someone just to avoid using a dating app like Tinder, it's important to consider your true intentions and desires for the relationship.

7. Do You Still Have Dating Apps Downloaded?

If you find yourself using dating apps while in a relationship, it may be a sign that you're not fully committed. Swiping through profiles while in a relationship can be a sign of a lack of interest in a real, long-term connection with your partner. If you're constantly using dating apps, it may be difficult to determine your true feelings for your current partner. It's important to be honest with yourself and your partner about your intentions and desires for the relationship.

8. Have You Given Him A Real Chance?

It's understandable to be hesitant about starting a new relationship if you've been hurt in the past. However, it's important to not let past experiences influence your current relationships. If you've met someone who seems nice and normal, it's worth giving them a chance and not immediately pulling away due to fear of being hurt again. It's important to be open to new experiences and not let past negative experiences hold you back.

9. Are You Afraid Of Ghosting?

Ghosting, or abruptly ending a relationship without any explanation, is a hurtful and disrespectful way to end a relationship. If you're not officially in a relationship and have not defined the status of your connection, it can be tempting to slowly fade away and stop seeing each other without explicitly ending things. However, this behavior is not fair to your partner and it's important to be honest and upfront about your intentions.

10. Do You Generally Consider Yourself A Needy Person?

One way to determine your true feelings for someone is to consider why you enjoy spending time with them. If you find that you're attracted to this person because they fulfill your need for attention, it may be that you're not genuinely interested in them as a partner. It's okay to admit that you have a lot of attention-seeking qualities, but it's important to be honest with yourself and your partner about the reasons for your feelings.

11. Is Your Life Pretty Boring In General?

If you're feeling bored or unfulfilled in your life, it can be tempting to cling to someone who shows interest in you as a source of excitement. However, it's not fair to pursue a relationship with someone if your feelings are not genuine.

12. Do You Care When He Talks To Other Women?

If you're not interested in someone, you may not care if they talk to or flirt with other people. On the other hand, if you have genuine feelings for someone, the thought of them being interested in or involved with someone else may cause you to feel upset or jealous. If you feel indifferent about your partner's interactions with other people, it may be a sign that you're not invested in the relationship.

13. Does It Feel Like He's More Into You Than You Are Into Him?

It's not uncommon for one person in a relationship to have stronger feelings than the other at certain times. However, if it consistently feels like your partner is more invested in the relationship than you are, it may be worth considering whether you're more interested in the attention than the person themselves. If this is the case, it's important to be honest with your partner about your feelings and to communicate openly about the status of the relationship.

14. Does It Kinda Gross You Out/make You Feel Weird Whenever He Touches You?

Physical intimacy can be an important part of a romantic relationship, and it's natural to feel a strong physical attraction to someone you like. If you feel uncomfortable or uninterested in physical intimacy with your partner, it could be a sign that the relationship is not meant to be.

15. Do You Only Reach Out To Him When You Don't Have Any Other Plans?

If you don't think of your partner first when making plans, it could be a sign that you're not as interested in them as you might think. If they only get invited to hang out when all of your other options are unavailable, it could be a sign that you're more interested in the attention they give you than in the person themselves.

16. Do You Ever Mention Him To Your Friends?

If you're genuinely interested in someone, it's common to want to talk about them constantly and share your excitement with your friends. If you find that you're not discussing your current partner with your friends or that they don't even know their name, it may be a sign that you're not truly interested in the person.

If you've come to the conclusion that a person you've been seeing is not a good fit for you, it's important to be honest with them about your feelings. It's better to end things and allow both parties to move on and find someone who is better suited for them. It's never easy to end a relationship, but it can ultimately be the best decision for both parties involved.

How To Let A Guy Down Gently When You Know You Don't Really Like Him

It's important to be honest and straightforward with someone if you realize that they are not a good fit for you. It's never easy to end a relationship, but it's important to be kind and considerate in your communication. Remember that just because someone is not right for you, it doesn't mean there is anything wrong with them. It's important to be respectful and understanding when ending a relationship.

1. Start From A Place Of Positivity

It can be helpful to start a difficult conversation by focusing on the positive aspects of the relationship. As licensed marriage and family therapist Dr. Carolina Pataky advises, "Always start your decline with a [statement that expresses gratitude]. You don't want to be rude or disrespectful and these statements can help ease the blow. This shows that you are still appreciating the person while being authentic to your feelings." By expressing gratitude, you can set a respectful and understanding tone for the conversation.

2. Be Honest About Where You Stand

It's important to be clear and straightforward with someone if you don't have romantic feelings for them. Instead of trying to soften the blow or leaving the door open for a potential future change in your feelings, it's important to be honest about your lack of interest. This can be difficult, but it's important to be honest and authentic in your communication to avoid causing unnecessary hurt or confusion. It's not fair to either party to leave things open-ended or to give false hope.

3. Don't Put Yourself Down To Lift Them Up

It's understandable to feel overwhelmed or unsure about how to handle a situation when rejecting someone's romantic advances. However, it's important to remember that you're not in the wrong just because you don't have the same feelings for this person. It's okay to be empathetic and kind while still being clear about your lack of interest. It's not necessary to put yourself down or make yourself out to be the "bad guy" in the situation.

4. Don't Drag It Out

After you've had an honest conversation about your feelings, it's important to allow the other person space to process their emotions. This may not be an extended, dramatic conversation, and it's important to respect each other's boundaries. If you think a friendship might be possible in the future, you can suggest it, but it's important to understand that it may take time for the other person to be ready for that. It's important to be respectful of their feelings and to allow them the space they need.

Watch the video below to discover additional indicators that you genuinely have feelings for him, rather than simply feeling desired.